Directors of large organisations recieve much higher salaries than ordinary workers. Some think it is necessary while other think it is unfair. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
Some people believe the chairman of the
company
must earn higher Use synonyms
salaries
than other Use synonyms
workers
, Use synonyms
however
, there is another attitude Linking Words
which
it is unfair. I know Correct word choice
that
recieving
unbalanced Correct your spelling
receiving
salaries
might cause dissatisfaction and show the Use synonyms
less
contributions of the Correct word choice
lower
worker
in Fix the agreement mistake
workers
Use synonyms
company
, but I disagree with that and I will examine and explain.
On the one hand, we are living in a fair world and it is reasonable that staff request balanced Add an article
the company
salaries
. The difference between Use synonyms
salaries
leads to dissatisfaction and demotivation in large companies. Use synonyms
In addition
, ordinary Linking Words
workers
contribute significantly to the Use synonyms
company
's success, and if it were not for their Use synonyms
endeavors
, the Change the spelling
endeavours
company
would never achieve their goals. Use synonyms
For example
, 95% of the Linking Words
workers
in Google are ordinary Use synonyms
wrokers
and the success of Correct your spelling
workers
this
Linking Words
company
Use synonyms
because
of Add a missing verb
is because
this
staff. Linking Words
Thus
, they might feel that they are not useful enough in Linking Words
Use synonyms
company
, but it is not true in real.
Despite Correct article usage
the company
this
, I think it can cause motivation which Linking Words
they
Correct pronoun usage
them
want
to grow Fix the infinitive
to want
their self
. Correct pronoun usage
themself
themselves
On the other hand
, the more Linking Words
position
that you have the more responsibility you have. Fix the agreement mistake
positions
For example
, if the Linking Words
company
Use synonyms
madewrong
decisions which lead to bankruptcy, the chairman is responsible for that. Correct your spelling
made wrong
Additionally
, offering high Linking Words
salaries
prevents directors from leaving the competitors and ensures stability in the Use synonyms
company
. Use synonyms
Therefore
, we should not ignore the importance of the directors in companies.
In conclusion, directors earn higher Linking Words
salaries
in large organisations than other ordinary Use synonyms
workers
, despite their disadvantages as Use synonyms
that
I indicated, Correct word choice
apply
on the contrary
, Linking Words
is
necessary because they are more responsible and the Correct pronoun usage
this is
company
should satisfy them.Use synonyms
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task achievement
Your essay presents a clear discussion of both views and an opinion, which is effective. However, to improve your score, ensure that your ideas are expressed more clearly and consider expanding on some points to add depth to your discussion.
coherence and cohesion
To improve coherence and cohesion, focus on structuring paragraphs more effectively. For instance, each idea should be discussed in a separate paragraph, and the argument should flow logically from one point to the next.
grammar and vocabulary
Work on grammar and sentence structure to minimize errors. This will enhance the clarity and professionalism of your writing.
task achievement
You provided a balanced discussion of both views, which shows a good understanding of the topic.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay includes a clear introduction and conclusion, which help frame the discussion well.
task achievement
You used relevant and specific examples to support your points, which strengthens your argument.