The graph below shows the proportions of workers in three different sectors in south korea between 1981 and 2011. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
The line graphs illustrate changes in the proportion of employment rate from 1981 to 2011 in South Korea, by three different sectors;services,
agriculture
and industry
.
Overall
, it is clear that
an upward trend was seen in the service sector
and it had the largest proportion throughout the period. On the other hand
, the agriculture
and the industry
sector
had declined over a 30-year period.
In 1981, the service department Fix the agreement mistake
sectors
initially
had 40% of the whole employees then
it had shot up to 70% in 2011. However
, the proportion of industry
workers
had gone up until 1991 by 35%, but started to shrink until 2011 and then
reached around 25%. Also
, agricultural workers
accounted for 30% of the whole employment rate in 1981, whereas
it had plummeted by 5% in 2011. In conclusion, the industry
sector
only had 1/5 workers
for the services and the agriculture
sector
had 1/12 employees for the services. In the beginning
there were fewer Add a comma
beginning,
workers
in the industry
than in agriculture
, but in 2011 agriculture
had the lowest number of employees among the three sectors.Submitted by JE
on
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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Vocabulary: Replace the words agriculture, industry, sector, workers with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 3 times.
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