IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

The graph below shows the percentage of female workers and workers aged 50 or above in the UK workforce. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevent.

The graph below shows the percentage of female workers and workers aged 50 or above in the UK workforce. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevent.
#percentage #workers #uk #workforce #summarise #information #features #comparisons #relevent
The graph displays the ratio of feminine and
worker
Fix the agreement mistake
workers
show examples
 more than the age of 50 or above in the UK workforce sector, from 1971 to 2019.
Overall
, from the beginning of the ratio, females were included more in work as
compare
Wrong verb form
compared
show examples
 to old age pupils till the end of 2019.
Moreover
, in 1990, the involvement of
aged
Correct article usage
the aged
show examples
group
has
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
started with 20% of participation.
Firstly
, in 1971, women were close to 40%
while
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 aged people
were not participated
Change to the active voice
did not participate
have not participated
show examples
 yet. Meanwhile, after
a
Change the article
the
show examples
 year 1990,
higher
Correct article usage
a higher
show examples
 age
group
involved
Add a missing verb
was involved
show examples
 in
workforce
Add an article
the workforce
a workforce
show examples
 of the United
kingdom
Capitalize word
Kingdom
show examples
, with 20% involvement,
it
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
 gradually
increase
Wrong verb form
increased
show examples
 year-by-year till 2019. Meanwhile, in
Change the article
the mid
show examples
mid 90s
Add a hyphen
mid-90s
show examples
,
female
Add an article
the female
a female
show examples
 contribution was quite stable as
compare
Change the form of the verb
compared
show examples
 to aged ones. In
last
Correct article usage
the last
show examples
 20 years, aged individuals
adds
Wrong verb form
added
show examples
 more than 10%,
similarly
,
Add an article
the female
a female
show examples
female
Fix the agreement mistake
females
show examples
had
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
joined
upto
Correct your spelling
up to
 5%. In
last
Correct article usage
the last
show examples
 20 to 25 years, after
inclusion
Correct article usage
the inclusion
show examples
 of
50 plus
Add a hyphen
50-plus
show examples
group
Fix the agreement mistake
groups
show examples
,
remaining
Add an article
the remaining
show examples
group
 had not much activity.
Submitted by rohanshingala7781 on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "last".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words group with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "compare" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "ratio" was used 2 times.
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