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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

The line graph shows the projected population growth of China and India. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The line graph shows the projected population growth of China and India. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#line #population #growth #china #india #summarise #information #features #comparisons
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This
 line graph
discribes
Correct your spelling
describes
rising
Correct article usage
the rising
show examples
 of population in India and China from 2000 to nowadays and
forecast
Correct subject-verb agreement
forecasts
show examples
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
 three decades up to 2050.
To
Change preposition
At
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
first
glance
Add a comma
glance,
show examples
 we can see that India
have
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
started
this
 period with
smaller
Add an article
a smaller
show examples
 population (1.0
billion
), and would
finished
Change the verb form
finish
show examples
 it with
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 significant prevalence in
quantity
Add an article
the quantity
a quantity
show examples
 of
people
 (1.6
billion
 and 1.4
billions
Change to singular
billion
show examples
 respectively). India started in 2000 with 1.0
billion
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
people
, and their number
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
increasing
Change the verb form
increased
show examples
 gradually without fluctuation and picks, up to 1.6
billions
Fix the agreement mistake
billion
show examples
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
people
,
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
 have been predicted in 2050. For today we have a quantity of
lightly
Correct your spelling
slightly
show examples
 more than 1.3
billions
Change to singular
billion
show examples
. China started
this
 observation period in 2000 with
population
Add an article
a population
show examples
 of 1.25
billion
people
. It
growth
Replace the word
grew
show examples
 slightly, and reached
number
Change the article
a number
the number
show examples
 of 1.42
billions
Change to singular
billion
show examples
 in 2020. It is assumed that
this
 number will increase up to 1.45
billions
Change to singular
billion
show examples
 around 2030
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 and that it will decline gradually to less than 1.4
billions
Change to singular
billion
show examples
 in 2050.
Submitted by anastasia on

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Linking words: Add some linking words.
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Linking words: Add more linking words.
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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words billion, people, billions with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "gradually" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • projected population growth
  • line graph
  • milestones
  • projections
  • plateau
  • decline
  • rate of growth
  • peak
  • surpass
  • crossover
  • period
  • trend analysis
  • comparative analysis
  • significantly
  • eventually
  • illustrates
  • specific period
  • trends
  • summarizes
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