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Writing Samples
Band 5

The pie charts below show the comparison of different kinds of energy production of France in two years.

The pie charts below show the comparison of different kinds of energy production of France in two years.
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Presented pie carts give the difference between
Use synonyms
energy
Correct article usage
the energy
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 production of France in two
years
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. The graphs show us the percentage of coal,
petro
Correct your spelling
petrol
, nuclear, gas, and other
energy
Use synonyms
productions
Fix the agreement mistake
production
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. In general, there was a slight change from 1995 to 2005. Coal
energy
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 slightly increased from 29.80% to 30.93 in five
years
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. The amount of gas production improved: when it was 29.63% in 1995, in 2005 it consisted of 30.31%.
Petro
Correct your spelling
The petrol
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 sector made up the biggest change between those two
years
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.
However
Linking Words
, it was a decline from nearly 30% to almost
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one fifth
Add a hyphen
one-fifth
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. Nuclear and other
energy
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productions
Fix the agreement mistake
production
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 dropped to approximately the same number. The former
Use synonyms
one
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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belonged to 6.40% in 1995,
after
Correct word choice
and after
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 five
years
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 it became
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one tenth
Add a hyphen
one-tenth
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. The latter production jumped from nearly
one
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twentys
Correct your spelling
per cent
 to around 9%.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Add more linking words.
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Replace the words energy, years, one with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "change" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "nearly" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "slight" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Nuclear energy
  • Renewable energy
  • Non-renewable energy
  • Technological advancements
  • Government policy
  • Environmental policies
  • Investment in renewable technologies
  • Traditional energy sources
  • Coal usage
  • Natural gas
  • Environmental regulations
  • Energy consumption
  • Energy production levels
  • Proportion
  • Broader trends
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