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Writing Samples
Band 7

The charts below show the percentage of workers in three sectors across four countries in 1980 and 2010.Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The charts below show the percentage of workers in three sectors across four countries in 1980 and 2010.Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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The given bar chart illustrates the proportion of employers that
work
Use synonyms
 in three different sectors across four
countries
Use synonyms
 between 1980 and 2010.
Overall
Linking Words
, China has the most workers in the
agriculture
Use synonyms
 field,
while
Linking Words
 the other
countries
Use synonyms
 have the most employers in the industry sector and the lowest in
agriculture
Use synonyms
. The proportion of people who
work
Use synonyms
 in the industries had a significant rise for the
countries
Use synonyms
 that include Germany, the USA and Japan,
while
Linking Words
 for China there has been a decrease in the
agriculture
Use synonyms
 sector. In 1980, China was
on
Change preposition
at
show examples
 top of the class having 70% of
workers
Correct pronoun usage
its workers
show examples
 in
agriculture
Use synonyms
,
while
Linking Words
 the other
countries
Use synonyms
 had most of their workers in the industry. Meanwhile, in 2010, the industry sector had shown an upward trend for three
countries
Use synonyms
.
For example
Linking Words
, in Germany, they hit their peak at 80% of people who
work
Use synonyms
 for industries,
while
Linking Words
 the proportion of people who
work
Use synonyms
 in
agriculture
Use synonyms
 is almost 0%.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words work, countries, agriculture with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 3 times.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • percentage
  • sector
  • distribution
  • dominance
  • decline
  • significant changes
  • employment
  • patterns
  • trends
  • global
  • compare
  • highlight
  • examine
  • identify
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