You live in a small university town. Last week, you drove it to a big city about two hours away to buy a new laptop at a good price. You worked on the laptop all week and finished writing a long assignment that is due shortly. In your letter: • Tell the store where you leave & what happened • Explain the problem with the laptop • State what action you would like this store to take

Dear SIR or MADAM I am
penning
Verb problem
writing
show examples
this
letter from a teeny university town. A short time ago
for buying
Change preposition
to buy
show examples
a new
laptop
, I went to your store
through
Change preposition
in
show examples
the large city
about
Change preposition
for about
show examples
two hours. I thought
laptop
Correct article usage
the laptop
show examples
which I
choose
Wrong verb form
chose
show examples
was not only satisfactory but
also
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
was
contemporary
Add an article
a contemporary
the contemporary
show examples
model. I want to
using
Change the verb
use
show examples
my
laptop
for my assignment. But right now I writing to complain about after one week the
laptop
totally
get
Verb problem
went
show examples
off. I'm disappointed because
laptop
Correct pronoun usage
my laptop
show examples
not only stopped working but
also
it
wasn't turns
Change the verb form
wasn't turned
show examples
on.
Most
Add an article
The most
show examples
important thing is my
laptop
projects and my assignments were deleted. It makes me more angry. I suggest that you replace the item. Because the
laptop
helps me not only in my assignments but
also
in communicating with my relatives and friends. I wish your store have to mix my
laptop
without
wage
Add an article
a wage
show examples
. And I hope
this
will not be returned again.
Your
Correct the word
Yours
show examples
faithfully Davronova Jasmina
Submitted by omondavlat91 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

greeting and closing
Ensure you format your letter correctly by using a consistent case for greetings and closures (e.g., 'Dear Sir or Madam' instead of 'Dear SIR or MADAM').
single idea per paragraph
Make sure each paragraph covers a single idea clearly and logically. For example, separate details about the problem with the laptop and the importance of the laptop to your work into different paragraphs for better clarity.
suitable writing tone
Maintain a polite yet firm tone and avoid emotional language for a more formal and suitable writing tone.
complete response
You have mentioned all the key points required in the task, such as the problem with the laptop and the desired action.
logical structure
The letter is generally clear and has a logical progression from one point to another, making it easy to understand the situation.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: