IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

You bought a TV a week ago but when you got home you discovered it did not work properly.You called customer service to report the problem but you have not yet received any help. Write a letter to the company and in your letter: #introduce yourself #explain the problem #and state what action you would like from the company

#tv #week #home #work #customer #service #report #help #company #action
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Dear Sir/Madam I am writing to complain about your company enterprise workers.
Firstly
, my full name is Komiljonova Komilaxon.I live in
center
Add an article
the center
show examples
 of Karshi.Your company
located
Add a missing verb
is located
show examples
 on the outskirts of the city of Karshi.A week ago,I bought a
TV
your
Change preposition
from your
show examples
 company.I found my long desired
TV
 in your store.
Then
 I bought
Correct article usage
a
show examples
TV
did
Correct pronoun usage
that did
show examples
 not work when I got home. Suddenly,I called customer service to report the problem.Customer services replied
me
Change preposition
to me
show examples
.They got my address and they asked about my problem.They
said
Add the punctuation
said,
show examples
 "We will go for 2 hours". 4 hours passed but they did not come.I waited. 2days passed
then
 I got angry.Because I had not yet received any help.That's why,I am writing you a letter of complaint.I am very angry.Why
do not
Correct your spelling
don't
your
Correct pronoun usage
you
show examples
 serve your employees on time? I look forward to receiving a full refund.You do not have to replace the
TV
.You must receive a full refund
my
Change preposition
of my
show examples
 money.
Your
Correct the word
Yours
show examples
 sincerely, Komiljonova Komilaxon
Submitted by omondavlat91 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response
The letter addresses all the points required by the task, but it could benefit from more precise and formal language.
coherence cohesion
Try to clearly separate each major point into different paragraphs. This will make your letter more organized and easier to read.
coherence cohesion
Ensure your letter follows a logical structure. For example, after introducing yourself, you could explain the problem, then detail your previous attempts to resolve it, and finally state the desired outcome.
task response
Maintain a formal tone throughout your letter, especially when making a complaint. Avoid using phrases like 'I am very angry'. Instead, you could write 'I am extremely disappointed with the service I have received.'
task response
The letter clearly introduces the writer and explains the problem with the TV.
coherence cohesion
You have included a greeting and closing, which adds to the politeness and formal structure of the letter.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • customer service
  • purchased
  • faulty
  • malfunction
  • resolution
  • prompt
  • replacement
  • refund
  • technician
  • urgent
  • escalate
  • unsatisfactory
  • disappointed
  • appreciate
  • address
What to do next:
Look at other essays: