You and your family have just come back from a holiday staying in a rented apartment overlooking the sea. The apartment was very unsatisfactory. Write a letter of complaint to the manager of the agency from which you rented the apartment. In your letter, —give details of the things that were unsatisfactory —explain the reactions of the members of your family —ask the manager what he/she is going to do about the situation

Dear Sir or Madam, I'm writing to complain about
I took
Wrong verb form
taking
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an
apartment
for staying a holiday with my family from near the sea. I used to rent your
apartment
which
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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for spending
Change preposition
to spend
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time on vacation.
However
,
this
time
accommodation
Correct article usage
the accommodation
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which you
recommend
Wrong verb form
recommended
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me
Change preposition
to me
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,
Remove the comma
apply
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was very unsatisfactory. The first problem
is
Wrong verb form
was
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that the
apartment
had not been cleaned. Everything was very messy and we
pured
Correct your spelling
poured
everywhere and wiped dust.
Then
I felt exhausted myself
,
Remove the comma
apply
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so that I was going to relax a bit. But the air condition broke down, that's why I could not have a rest well You
explained
Add the preposition
explained to
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me that the
apartment
had all of
facilities
Add an article
the facilities
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for staying and relaxing.
Hence
, I recommend my family
this
accommodation for
holiday
Correct article usage
the holiday
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. But
then
I felt very embarrassed in front of them.
This
event really affected their mood and they punished me.
Furthermore
, my
parents
Change to a genitive case
parent's
parents'
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trust was lost
by
Change preposition
apply
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me
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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and they don't believe me anymore. My parents don't want to stay here anymore. I'm going to ask you
explain
Fix the infinitive
to explain
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this
situation to them. And I demand you replace to
apartment
us which is more comfortable and has all
opportunities
Correct article usage
the opportunities
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. I look forward to your reply and a resolution to my problem. Yours faithfully, Lucy.
Submitted by omondavlat91 on

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coherence cohesion
Consider breaking down the long paragraph into smaller ones to improve readability and coherence.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that minor grammatical errors and awkward phrasing are corrected to improve clarity and communication.
task achievement
Improve the clarity and professionalism of the language used to increase the effectiveness of the complaint.
task achievement
The letter covers all required points: details of the issues, family reactions, and a clear request for resolution.
greeting and closing
The ending of the letter is polite, which is appropriate for a letter of complaint.
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