The line graph below gives the information about the rates of unemployment between 1991 and 2005 in three different countries.The table shows the percentage of men and women in the workforce in three countries.

The line graph below gives the information about the rates of unemployment between 1991 and 2005 in three different countries.The table shows the percentage of men and women in the workforce in three countries.
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The chart shows information about the
unemployment
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rate in
period
Correct article usage
a period
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of 15 years from 1991 to 2005. The table below illustrates the percentage of employed people in three countries belonging to both gender groups.
Overall
Linking Words
,starting in 1991, the employment rate for
men
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is higher than that of
women
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in all three European countries.
Spain
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among the countries had the lowest joblessness rates
in
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of
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all three,
while
Linking Words
it became
a
Correct article usage
the
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country with the highest rates of
unemployment
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in 2005. In 1991, the employment rates of
men
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and
women
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in
Germany
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were higher than
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Spain
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in Spain
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and Italy, with 76.5%
men
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and 54.4%
women
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for
Germany
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, 66.2%
men
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and 32.3%
women
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for
Spain
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and
then
Linking Words
Italy with 77.1% for
men
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and 37.8% for
women
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. From 1991 to 1997,
Germany
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always was country had a higher
unemployment
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rate than
Spain
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and Italy, from about 13% in 1991 to 16% in 1997. At the same time ,
Spain
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and Italy only had 9% and 12% in 1997 ,respectively. During the period from 1991 to 2005,
unemployment
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in
Spain
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tended to increase from 7% in 1999 to 11% in 2005,
while
Linking Words
joblessness in
Germany
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and Italy tended downward ,from about 12% to 9% for
Germany
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and 12% to 7% for Italy.
Submitted by lyhuongclc on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.
Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
Vocabulary: Replace the words unemployment, men, women, spain, germany with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • unemployment rates
  • workforce participation
  • line graph
  • percentage
  • trends
  • comparison
  • data analysis
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