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Writing Samples
Band 7.5

The charts below show the percentage of workers in three sectors across four countries in 1980 and 2010.Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The charts below show the percentage of workers in three sectors across four countries in 1980 and 2010.Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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The chart illustrates the distribution of employees across three sectors in four
countries
Use synonyms
 for the years 1980 and 2010. It is apparent that the industrial sector consistently held the largest share of the workforce in nearly all of these
countries
Use synonyms
 during both years.
According to
Linking Words
 what is shown in 1980 the percentage of
workers
Use synonyms
 in all the three sectors is almost the same in the four
countries
Use synonyms
.
however
Linking Words
, China has a different percentage distribution agriculture presenting 70% of
workers
Use synonyms
.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, Germany has almost 5 % of agricultural
workers
Use synonyms
.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, in 2010 there was an increase in industry
workers
Use synonyms
 in Germany, the USA, and Japan.
Although
Linking Words
 China had a decrease in all the three sectors. and Germany still has the highest number of industry
workers
Use synonyms
.
To sum up
Linking Words
, we could say that industry worker is the future and will continue to increase. agriculture describes the practice of growing crops or raising animals.
In other words
Linking Words
, not all these
countries
Use synonyms
 have an agricultural environment.

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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Vocabulary: Replace the words countries, workers with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 2 times.
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