The line chart provides information regarding the number of visitor to and from United Kingdom over two decades from 1979 to 1999 while the bar chart illustrates the country's popularity rated based on their UK visitors number.

The line chart provides information regarding the number of visitor to and from United Kingdom over two decades from 1979 to 1999 while the bar chart illustrates the country's popularity rated based on their UK visitors number.
The line chart illustrates the
number
of visitor that comes and goes from
UK
Correct article usage
the UK
show examples
between 1979 to 1999,
while
the
graph
shows the
demanded
Verb problem
apply
show examples
countries
that
often
Add a missing verb
are often
show examples
visited by
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
UK
citizens.
Overall
, the amount of
visitor
Fix the agreement mistake
visitors
show examples
has increased drastically from 1979 to 1999 and France is the most famous country to travel by
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
UK
residents. In the first
graph
, in 1979, the
number
of
traveler
Change to a plural noun
travelers
show examples
who
traveled
Change the spelling
travelled
show examples
to
UK
Correct article usage
the UK
show examples
were
Change the verb form
was
show examples
only 10
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
.
This
number
still
Add a missing verb
is still
show examples
defeated by the
number
of
UK
residents who
traveled
Change the spelling
travelled
show examples
abroda
Correct your spelling
abroad
which
amount
Correct subject-verb agreement
amounts
show examples
slightly
Change preposition
to slightly
show examples
over 10
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
. The
populations
Fix the agreement mistake
population
show examples
has steadily risen until the spike
happen
Wrong verb form
happened
show examples
at
Change preposition
apply
show examples
around 1986. After 1989, the amount continuously grew larger and peaked in 1999 with over 50
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
British went to trip overseas.
This
was the same for the
number
of foreign
visitors
, despite the gap in total population, the
number
of foreign
tourist
Change to a plural noun
tourists
show examples
who visited
UK
Correct article usage
the UK
show examples
peaked at approximately 25
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
in 1999.
Then
, the second
graph
has a breakdown
details
Change preposition
of details
show examples
about
top
Correct article usage
the top
show examples
5
countries
that the British people often
traveled
Wrong verb form
travel
show examples
to. The most popular country was France with over 10
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
UK
visitors
, followed by Spain with a bit under
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
10
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
. After that, the
last
remaining
countries
were
USA
Correct article usage
the USA
show examples
(about 4
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
UK
tourists), Greece (slightly under 4
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
), and Turkey (approximately 2,5
millions
Change to singular
million
show examples
). In conclusion, the line
graph
shows the
number
of foreign citizens who visited
UK
Correct article usage
the UK
show examples
and
UK
residents who
traveled
Change the spelling
travelled
show examples
abroad,
whereas
the bar chart provides information about the most adored
countries
that
have been
Wrong verb form
were
show examples
visited by
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
UK
visitors
in 1999. Both the
number
of overseas tourists and
UK
travelers
Change the spelling
travellers
show examples
in the first chart has
been surged
Change to the active voice
surged
show examples
from 1979 to 1999.
Accordingly
, around 10%
UK
Change preposition
of UK
show examples
visitors
has
Change the verb form
have
show examples
been
traveled
Change the spelling
travelled
show examples
to France and the other 10%
traveled
Change the spelling
travelled
show examples
to Spain.
Submitted by annisaseptidwiyanti on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Replace the words number, uk, graph, countries, millions, visitors with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 4 times.
Vocabulary: The word "shows" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 7 times.
Vocabulary: The word "approximately" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "slightly" was used 2 times.

You are not ready for IELTS Speaking, if you

  • Can’t speak smoothly without pauses.
  • Use simple words and lack vocabulary.
  • Feel nervous and anxious when speaking.
What to do next:
Look at other essays:

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!