Your manager is surveying employees' opinions about commuting preferences. It is the company’s 10th year anniversary and your manager would like to offer a gift to all employees. She would like to know if the staff would prefer to receive a free underground parking pass for one year or a free public transit pass for one year. Option A: I would like the one-year underground parking pass. Option B: I would like the one-year public transit pass.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
After reviewing deeply the two options provided, I consider that the most convenient option for us as employees is option B, receiving free public
transit
for
one
year
as an anniversary gift, rather than
one
year
a free underground parking pass for
one
year
. My main reasons are:
Firstly
, bearing in mind that more than 60% of employees commute to the job through public transportation,
this
benefit will impact positively the majority of workers. Cost savings will be a crucial factor impacted by
this
initiative since employees could save on fuel, parking fees, and even car usage.
At
Change the preposition
In
show examples
the end, option B will foster not only people who commute by public
transit
but
also
car owners.
Secondly
, reducing the use of cars by promoting the use of public
transit
will decrease the carbon footprint;
thus
, the company will show their commitment to the environment through sustainable commuting. In conclusion, I strongly believe that bringing a free public
transit
pass for
one
year
could have a greater impact on all the staff and the organization. I am pleased to be part of
this
survey, and I will embrace any decision made by the company.
Submitted by mariajoser3 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response
Try to vary sentence structures and incorporate some complex sentences to showcase a higher level of proficiency.
coherence cohesion
Ensure smooth transitions between paragraphs and ideas to enhance the flow even further.
task response
The essay provides a clear preference and supports it with logical reasons and examples.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion are well-defined, nicely framing your argument.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • commuting expenses
  • carbon footprint
  • sustainable travel
  • physical activity
  • traffic congestion
  • travel times
  • dedicated lanes
  • priority services
  • vehicle maintenance
  • fuel costs
What to do next:
Look at other essays: