IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

The world of work is changing rapidly and employees cannot depend on having the same job or the same working conditions for life. Discuss the possible causes for this rapid change, and suggest ways of preparing people for the world of work in the future. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

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It is an inevitable fact that nowadays the environment of work is advancing significantly there are several reasons for
such
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 a
change
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 and
also
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 some circumstances which
has been
Wrong verb form
have
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 resulted
due to
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this
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 issue of worldwide
change
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. Both the reasons and the influences are elaborated
further
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. Examining the reasons, the most common is that Technology has advanced over the decades.
This
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 is because of the scientists who tried to create devices that would make people's
life
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lives
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 easier.
For instance
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, a robot named Elissa had been invented
last
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 year.
This
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 robot has the ability to walk, talk and process better than
human
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humans
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. With these kinds of tools being created over the
years
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years,
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 human abilities will be no more needed.
Moreover
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, the other cause is the creation of automated machines. Previously, many tasks used to be done manually,
however
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 in modern society many
thing
Change to a plural noun
things
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 are mostly done by
new
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newly
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 invented machines.
For example
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, there are car washes which are totally automatic. The cars are being washed completely automatically, human is not at all involved in the task.
nevertheless
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, with the global
change
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 individuals need to
change
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to
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apply
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other
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apply
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wise
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wise,
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 they will not have a place in
the
Correct article usage
apply
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society.
On the contrary
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, the combat the issue some productive steps can help to overcome
to
Correct pronoun usage
it to
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large
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a large
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extend
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extent
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. The foremost one is that additional
courses
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regard to
Replace the word
regarding
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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technology
such
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 as, coding classes can be provided to employers in each company.
Besides
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 that, aside
of
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from
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 the society subjects should be altered too.
For example
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, in my school recently programming
courses
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 have been added to our timetable,
therefore
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 most of the students know how to create software and how do they work. These
courses
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 will help the students to be ready for the feature expectations
the
Change preposition
of the
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 field of work.
To conclude
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,
although
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 there are several issues
due to
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 the worldwide
change
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.
However
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, taking steps
such
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 as educational advancements in schools and providing coding
courses
Use synonyms
 for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
employees can primarily solve the problems.

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introduction conclusion
Your introduction would benefit from a clearer and more concise statement. Consider summarizing the causes and solutions briefly without letting it become cumbersome.
logical structure
Ensure logical progression between main points and paragraphs. Transition words and phrases could be used more effectively to enhance coherence.
overall writing
Improve grammar and punctuation to make your essay clearer. Pay attention to sentence structure and verb forms. Small errors sometimes detract from readability.
relevant specific examples
Add more detailed examples to strengthen your arguments. While your examples are interesting, a bit more specificity would make them more convincing.
relevant specific examples
You have provided relevant examples such as Elissa the robot and automatic car washes to illustrate automation and technological advancement, showing a clear understanding of the topic.
complete response
Your response addresses both the causes of changes in the workplace and potential solutions effectively, covering the prompt comprehensively.
relevant specific examples
You have mentioned practical measures like coding classes and educational advancements, showing insightful suggestions for the future of work.
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