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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The line graph shows the percentages of Australian export with four countries. The graph below shows the percentage of Australian exports to 4 countries from 1990 to 2012

The line graph shows the percentages of Australian export with four countries. The graph below shows the percentage of Australian exports to 4 countries from 1990 to 2012
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The bar chart shows the
percentage
Use synonyms
 of
Use synonyms
Australia
Correct your spelling
Australian
show examples
exports
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a
Change preposition
to a
show examples
few countries between 1990 to 2012.
Overall
Linking Words
, the data shows the highest
percentage
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Use synonyms
exports
Change preposition
of exports
show examples
 in
Australia
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 is
US
Correct article usage
the US
show examples
,
while
Linking Words
india
Change the capitalization
India
show examples
 is the Lowest
percentage
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 of
Australia
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's
Exports
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. In the First year, Japan started with the Highest
percentage
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 of
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Australia
Correct your spelling
Australian
show examples
exports
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 at over 25%,
however
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 figure gradually decreased to just below 20% by 2012. The US
initially
Linking Words
 received around 10%
ofAustralian
Correct your spelling
of Australian
 export,
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
fluctuating slightly over the years,
then
Linking Words
 reaching its peak at 12% by 2000,
nevertheless
Linking Words
, sharply declined to around 5% by 2012. China's share of Australian
exports
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 shows a significant upward trend. Starting at around 2% which received the second-lowest position in 1990. Suddenly, the
percentage
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 increased
steadly
Correct your spelling
steadily
 and dramatically after 2005,
then
Linking Words
 peaking at around 27% by 2012. China is the largest recipient of Australian
exports
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 by the end of the period. The
last
Linking Words
, India started with virtually no
exports
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 from
Australia
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 in 1990.
However
Linking Words
, experienced steady growth from 1995 onward, rising to around 5% in the
last
Linking Words
 period. In conclusion, during
the
Correct determiner usage
that
show examples
 time Japan and
US
Correct article usage
the US
show examples
 saw a decline in their share of
Use synonyms
Australia
Correct your spelling
Australian
show examples
exports
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. china's
exports
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 surged, overtaking all other countries with
india
Change the capitalization
India
show examples
also
Linking Words
 showing
noticiable
Correct your spelling
noticeable
 growth.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "however, last".
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Basic structure: Use less body paragraphs.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words percentage, australia, exports with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "shows" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "shows" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 5 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "declined" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "growth" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 5 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Line graph
  • Percentage
  • Exports
  • Trend analysis
  • Upward/downward trend
  • Fluctuation
  • Comparison
  • Peak performance
  • Decline
  • Stability
  • Significant
  • Inferred
  • Global events
  • Economic context
  • Reflect
  • Influence
  • Patterns
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