IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

The line graph shows the percentages of Australian export with four countries. The graph below shows the percentage of Australian exports to 4 countries from 1990 to 2012

The line graph shows the percentages of Australian export with four countries. The graph below shows the percentage of Australian exports to 4 countries from 1990 to 2012
#line #percentages #australian #export #four #countries #percentage #exports
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The illustration depicts the portion of four countries'
export
Fix the agreement mistake
exports
show examples
 in Australia in the span of 22
years
Use synonyms
; from 1990 to 2012. China has the increasing
trend
Use synonyms
 number of
export
Fix the agreement mistake
exports
show examples
,
while
Linking Words
India
Use synonyms
 almost consistently gained the lowest.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, among the four nations, China started as the lowest exporter with less than 5% second to
India
Use synonyms
 in the starting
year
Use synonyms
 with about a
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
.
However
Linking Words
, it showed an upward
trend
Use synonyms
 every five
years
Use synonyms
 and skyrocketed to 30% on its
last
Linking Words
year
Use synonyms
, which is more than a quarter from the first
year
Use synonyms
.
Although
Linking Words
 China experienced an upward
trend
Use synonyms
, it was evident that Japan
has
Wrong verb form
had
show examples
 the highest portion out of the other nations in the beginning
year
Use synonyms
 with more than 25%, but dramatically
plumetted
Correct your spelling
plummeted
 for the next
years
Use synonyms
 with less than a fifth in
Use synonyms
year
Change the article
the year
show examples
 2012.
Same
Correct article usage
The same
show examples
 goes
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
US
Correct article usage
the US
show examples
, where in the first
year
Use synonyms
 has one in ten.
Then
Linking Words
 slightly dropped to less than 10% after five
years
Use synonyms
, and recovered to
same
Add an article
the same
show examples
 starting number. Despite the rise, it still sank to following
years
Use synonyms
 until the
last
Linking Words
year
Use synonyms
 with more than one in twenty, which is
a
Change the article
apply
show examples
half on its starting
year
Use synonyms
.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
India
Use synonyms
 has the lowest recorded export as evidenced
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the starting
year
Use synonyms
 with barely a
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
. Though
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 it showed a slight increase
to
Change preposition
in
show examples
 its
trend
Use synonyms
, the other three countries
dominates
Change the verb form
dominate
show examples
 over
than
Change preposition
apply
show examples
India
Use synonyms
. It peaked just in
Use synonyms
year
Change the article
the year
show examples
 2010 with fairly more than 5%.
Submitted by emmagallares on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "last".
▼
Introduction: The introduction is missing.
▼
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
▼
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words years, trend, india, year with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "showed" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 4 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "slightly" was used 2 times.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Line graph
  • Percentage
  • Exports
  • Trend analysis
  • Upward/downward trend
  • Fluctuation
  • Comparison
  • Peak performance
  • Decline
  • Stability
  • Significant
  • Inferred
  • Global events
  • Economic context
  • Reflect
  • Influence
  • Patterns
What to do next:
Look at other essays: