You started in your present job two years ago. You now feel it is important for your career development to move to a different department in the same company. Write a letter to your manager. In your letter say what you have learned in your present job suggest how the company would benefit from moving you to a different department explain why you do not wish to leave the company
Dear Mr. Akbari,
I hope
this
letter find
you well. I am writing to express you Change the verb form
finds
about
all I have learned in my Change preposition
apply
vcerrentlt
Correct your spelling
currently
position
. As you know I have got the position
of technical inspection
manager in lift equipment and also
technical coordinator in welding inspection
. I have learned many thing
about these scopes of technical Change to a plural noun
things
inspection
, for instace
, about health, safety and Correct your spelling
instance
environment
and Correct article usage
the environment
also
I have learned about canformties
and nonconformities of Correct your spelling
conformities
inspection
and spcially
I have many things about Correct your spelling
especially
issueing
certificates.
Correct your spelling
issuing
In addition
, I want to put forward a suggestion about new
Add an article
a new
position
in quality
Correct article usage
the quality
conrol
department and it would Correct your spelling
control
be so appreciate
if you could follow up Change the verb form
be so appreciated
my
suggestion. I think I am a good employee for Change preposition
on my
this
position
,
because accuracy and commitment are very beneficial for Remove the comma
apply
QC
department and I am not only accurate but Correct article usage
the QC
also
commited
.
Correct your spelling
committed
Lastly
, I would have to say that I have a great loyaliti
to the company and I will never leave it.
Thanks for your attention.
Your Correct your spelling
loyalty
faithfuly
Masoud MehranfarCorrect your spelling
faithfully
faithful
Submitted by jingelbing on
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Coherence and Cohesion
Improve the logical flow between paragraphs for enhanced coherence.
Task Achievement
Address any spelling and grammatical errors for better clarity.
Task Achievement
The letter clearly addresses the purpose of writing to the manager about career development.
Task Achievement
The writer effectively uses a formal tone appropriate for writing to a manager.
Task Achievement
Each part of the request (learning, suggestion, and reason for staying) is somewhat addressed, showing understanding of task requirements.
The Closing
The style of the letter determine how you have to close it.
Check out the suggested closing sentences for each type of letter in the General IELTS Test. The closing sentence should be the last sentence of your letter.
Formal style (To someone you have not met, whose name you don’t know)
- Yours faithfully,
Semi-formal (To someone you may or may not have met, whose last name you know)
- Yours sincerely,
Informal (To someone you know well, whose first name you know and use)
- Best regards,
- Warm wishes,
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
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