IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

The charts show the percentage of male and female workers in three employment sectors in two countries in 2007.

The charts show the percentage of male and female workers in three employment sectors in two countries in 2007.
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The pie charts show two sexual workers in percentages in three employment positions in two parts of the world in 2007.
Overall
Linking Words
, the amount of Industry triples higher in
B
Use synonyms
 from A .
While
Linking Words
, the extent of services is significantly greater in female jobholders in state
B
Use synonyms
 than in sector A . Services measurement is 9 % higher than 56% in male employees in nation
B
Use synonyms
 than the same one in A.
While
Linking Words
 the agriculture's extent is 26% more than
B
Use synonyms
 male portion 3 %. But in sector industry
B
Use synonyms
 male countryside has 32 % which is more by 17% than male province A. Services' measurement is the same
while
Linking Words
, the female labourers in Kingdom A's agriculture is more than 42 % from female assistants in part
B
Use synonyms
 in 1%.The A's industry percentage is 8% which is lower than
3
Correct article usage
the 3
show examples
% of
Correct article usage
the B
show examples
B
Use synonyms
one
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words b with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "show" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentages" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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