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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The chart below shows the value of one country's exports in various categories during 2015 and 2016. The table shows the percentage change in each category of exports in 2016 compared with 2015. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The chart below shows the value of one country's exports in various categories during 2015 and 2016. The table shows the percentage change in each category of exports in 2016 compared with 2015. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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The bar chart shows the cost of several categories of one country’s exports from 2015 to 2016,
while
Linking Words
 the table depicts the shift in the percentage of every type of
export
Use synonyms
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
 2016 in comparison with 2015. The bar chart illustrates
export
Use synonyms
 income in billions of dollars in 2015-2016. The biggest profits were earned by the
export
Use synonyms
 of petroleum
products
Use synonyms
 in both years with almost the same amount of money (60
billion
Use synonyms
 and around 60 respectively). The sale of engineered goods generated approximately equal revenue with 57
billion
Use synonyms
 dollars in 2015 compared to 61
billion
Use synonyms
 dollars in 2016.
While
Linking Words
 the first two categories were relatively valuable, gems and
jewellery
Use synonyms
 as items to
export
Use synonyms
 had a maximum of 42
billion
Use synonyms
 in 2015 and just 40
billion
Use synonyms
 the following year. Agricultural
products
Use synonyms
 were even less
as
Change preposition
than
show examples
jewellery
Use synonyms
 with a total income of 30-31
billion
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 in 2015 and 31-32
billion
Use synonyms
 in 2016. The least profitable category was textiles in both years – 26
billion
Use synonyms
 in 2015 and 31-32
billion
Use synonyms
 the year after. The table indicates the
change
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 in the percentage of categories through 2015-2016. The biggest and the most positive improvement is the shift in textiles
export
Use synonyms
 which increased by 15.24% from 2015 to 2016. The second largest
change
Use synonyms
 was in engineered goods (8.5% upward). The
export
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 of gems and
jewellery
Use synonyms
 decreased by 5.18 percentage points. Petroleum
products
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 had a slight
change
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 with 3% upward,
while
Linking Words
 agricultural
products
Use synonyms
 almost did not
change
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 (only 0.81% downward). 
Overall
Linking Words
, both the pie chart and the table show
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
positive trends in exporting petroleum
products
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,
engineered
Change the form of the verb
engineering
show examples
 goods and textiles with downward trends in supplying
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
jewellery
Use synonyms
 and agricultural
products
Use synonyms
.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Replace the words export, products, billion, jewellery, change with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "shows" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "percentage" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "table" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "shows" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "change" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "trends" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "downward" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • export value
  • economic sector
  • percentage change
  • increment
  • decrement
  • fluctuation
  • trend analysis
  • year-on-year comparison
  • significant growth/decline
  • stagnation
  • market dynamics
  • fiscal repercussions
  • trade balance
  • competitive advantage
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