IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The charts below show the proportions of British students at one university in England who were able to speak other languages in addition to English, in 2000 and 2010. Summarise the information by selecting

The charts below show the proportions of British students at one university in England who were able to speak other languages in addition to English, in 2000 and 2010. Summarise the information by selecting
#show #proportions #british #students #university #england #languages #addition #english #summarise #information
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The pie charts
illustrates
Change the verb form
illustrate
show examples
 the percentages of students in the United Kingdom at one university in England
as well as
 they can
to
Change the verb form
apply
show examples
speak different languages
moreover
 they
speak
Wrong verb form
spoke
show examples
 English during the period of one decade from 2000 to 2010. 
Overall
, it can seen that the most popular
language
 was Spanish only .
However
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
other languages like
Germany
Replace the word
German
show examples
 and
non
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
other
Fix the agreement mistake
others
show examples
language
they
Correct your spelling
the
show examples
were
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
lowest common uses. To
began
Change the form of the verb
begin
show examples
,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Germany only and 2 other languages as the same proportion 10 % and 10% respectively, in one decade.
While
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 in 2000 the
student
Fix the agreement mistake
number of students
show examples
 who speak France only
had been
Verb problem
apply
show examples
declined in the year 2010
to
Correct your spelling
it
show examples
 made up 10 % .
In
contrast
Add a comma
contrast,
show examples
Another
Fix the agreement mistake
Other languages
show examples
language
 were 20 per cent in
2010s
Correct article usage
the 2010s
show examples
 ,
However
 in 2000 decreased to
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
15 %. The percentage of no other
language
 in 2010 was 10 per cent
likewise
 in 2000 they
increase
Wrong verb form
increased
show examples
 to reach just under a
quarters
Correct the article-noun agreement
quarter
show examples
. In 2009, there
was
Correct subject-verb agreement
were
show examples
 30 % who
speak
Wrong verb form
spoke
show examples
Spanish only but the
per cent
Correct your spelling
percentage
show examples
growth
Replace the word
grew
show examples
 to 35 % in 2010.
Submitted by sialamer on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "however".
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words language with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentages" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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