Band 7+: The bar chart below shows the percentage of Australian men and women in different age groups who did regular physical activity in 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Band 7+: The bar chart below shows the percentage of Australian men and women in different age groups who did regular physical activity in 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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The given bar graph illustrates the proportion of male and female population of various
age
groups from Australia engaged in
continous
Correct your spelling
continuous
physical
exercise
in the year 2010
Overall
, from the stats provided, we can understand that there were more
women
who attended daily
exercise
in all
age
group
Fix the agreement mistake
groups
show examples
except in
age
Correct article usage
the age
show examples
group of 15 to 24
years
. Only at
age
Correct article usage
the age
show examples
of 15 to 24
years
, there were more
men
than
women
.
Moreover
, almost
same
Correct article usage
the same
show examples
amount of
men
and
women
exercised in the
age
group of 65 and over.
According to
the data, the percentage of Australian
men
doing regular
exercise
showed a gradual dip from 15
years
to 44
years
and
slighly
Correct your spelling
slightly
increased by almost 8% by 65 and over. Around 54%
men
Change preposition
of men
show examples
aged 14 to 24
years
exercised
everyday
Replace the word
every day
show examples
in 2010 which declined by almost 10% by the
age
of 65 and over.
However
, the amount of female Australians performing daily
exercise
increased over
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
age
with the lowest of almost 48% at the
begining
Correct your spelling
beginning
of the
age
and
highest
Correct article usage
the highest
show examples
at 55% during the
age
of 45 to 54
years
.
Furthermore
, the percentage of exercising
women
declined by 10% by the
age
of 65 and over.
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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
Vocabulary: Replace the words age, exercise, women, years, men with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "declined" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 4 times.
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