IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2.5

Employers should give longer holidays to employees to encourage them to do their job well. To what extent do you agree

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Some people believe that the employees should have a longer
weekend
Use synonyms
 and the number of
work
Correct your spelling
workdays
show examples
days
Use synonyms
 during the
week
Use synonyms
 should be decreased.
This
Linking Words
 essay totally disagrees with
this
Linking Words
 statement because it would be hard to catch up with the unfinished tasks and companies would have to increase the working hours throughout those working
days
Use synonyms
. The first reason is
this
Linking Words
 policy might disturb the employees and
makes
Correct subject-verb agreement
make
show examples
 it difficult to continue the remaining tasks of
last
Linking Words
week
Use synonyms
. Expanding the
days
Use synonyms
 off
end
Add an article
the end
show examples
 of each
week
Use synonyms
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 may cause issues with
routine
Add an article
the routine
show examples
.
For instance
Linking Words
, the time of sleep may change at the
weekend
Use synonyms
 and it would be extremely hard to make it right again for work. Another reason would be the
raise
Correct your spelling
rise
show examples
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
 working hours, The employers would have to increase the time during the working
days
Use synonyms
 to manage the absence of workers for extra
days
Use synonyms
 off at the
weekend
Use synonyms
.
Such
Linking Words
 policies are more likely to make employees exhausted and to decrease
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
job satisfaction. In conclusion, the shorter working
week
Use synonyms
 and more
day
Fix the agreement mistake
days
show examples
 off at the
weekend
Use synonyms
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
 not approved by
this
Linking Words
 essay
due to
Linking Words
 disturbing the
workers
Change noun form
worker's
workers'
show examples
 routine and the
raise
Correct your spelling
rise
show examples
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
 working hours per day.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Try to provide more specific examples to support your points.
coherence cohesion
Ensure each paragraph has a clear central idea that links smoothly to the next.
task achievement
Work on expanding ideas more fully to clearly illustrate your argument.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion.
coherence cohesion
The argument is clearly stated and paragraph structure is generally well maintained.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: