IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

You recently bought a piece of sports equipment from an online store. When you first used the piece pf equipment, you found a problem with it. Write a letter to the manager of the online store. In your letter : describe the problem with the piece of sports equipment. say what happened because of the problem. explain what you would like the company to do. Begin your letter as follows : Dear Sir or Madam,

#piece #sports #equipment #store #first #pf #manager #company #sir #madam
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Dear Sir/Madam, I hope
this
Linking Words
 letter finds you well. I recently purchased
a
Change the article
an
show examples
 electric bike from your online store. When I received it the box
damaged
Add a missing verb
was damaged
show examples
. I thought it was just because of the shipping but when I tried to use it the digital console display was not working. I would like for a replacement of the product. Please check your items before you ship
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
 to your customers. We do not
the
Add a missing verb
have the
show examples
 chance to check before we receive it. We trusted your store
that is
Linking Words
way
Correct your spelling
why
show examples
 we purchased it
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
you online. I hope to hear from you soon.
Sincerly
Correct your spelling
Sincerely
, Lexah
Submitted by yum_1229 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
Ensure paragraphs contain a single clear idea to improve coherence.
task achievement
Try to develop ideas more thoroughly to fully achieve task response.
task achievement
The letter maintains a polite and formal tone throughout, suitable for a letter of complaint.
coherence cohesion
The structure of the greeting and closing is appropriate and clear.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: