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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

The charts below give information on the proportions of water which is used for various purposes in six countries. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The charts below give information on the proportions of water which is used for various purposes in six countries. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
#information #proportions #water #purposes #six #countries #summarise #features #comparisons
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The charts
imagine
Verb problem
give
show examples
 information on the proportions
different
Change preposition
of different
show examples
 types of used water (Industrial
Use
Use synonyms
,
Agriculture
Use synonyms
Use
Use synonyms
 and Domestic
Use
Use synonyms
) in six countries amount is North
America
Use synonyms
, South
America
Use synonyms
, Europe, Africa, Central
Asia
Use synonyms
 and South East
Asia
Use synonyms
.
Overall
Linking Words
, the highest quantity of Industrial
Use
Use synonyms
 water was in North
America
Use synonyms
,
while
Linking Words
 the lowest number was in Central
Asia
Use synonyms
.
Agriculture
Use synonyms
Use
Use synonyms
 was
largest
Correct article usage
the largest
show examples
 type everywhere than North
America
Use synonyms
.
Finally
Linking Words
, Domestic
Use
Use synonyms
 was the smaller one of
units
Correct article usage
the units
show examples
.
For example
Linking Words
, the lower output of Domestic
Use
Use synonyms
 was in South East
Asia
Use synonyms
 and in Central
Asia
Use synonyms
 equals 7%. In terms of
Agriculture
Use synonyms
Use
Use synonyms
 was
leader
Add an article
the leader
a leader
show examples
 of the charts in every
countries
Change to a singular noun
country
show examples
 except North
America
Use synonyms
 and Europe. At the same
time
Add a comma
time,
show examples
 it is worth noting,
Agriculture
Use synonyms
Use
Use synonyms
 reached 84%, 88%, and 81% in Africa, Central
Asia
Use synonyms
 and
accordingly
Linking Words
 South East
Asia
Use synonyms
. To illustrate which country was
front
Add an article
the front
show examples
 runner of
amount
Correct article usage
the amount
show examples
 types used water, Africa used 84% of
Agriculture
Use synonyms
Use
Use synonyms
, North
America
Use synonyms
 made 48% average,
on the contrary
Linking Words
 South
America
Use synonyms
 used 19% of
Domestic
Correct article usage
the Domestic
show examples
 kind.
Submitted by viktoriuos2002 on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words use, agriculture, america, asia with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "charts" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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