IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

You recently visited a restaurant, and the service was poor. Write a letter to the restaurant management. Describe your experience at the restaurant. Explain how the poor service affected your meal or evening. Request an apology or compensation.

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Dear Sir, I am writing to express my dissatisfaction with the service which I got from your
restaurant
Use synonyms
.
Last
Linking Words
 week, I booked your
restaurant
Use synonyms
 for an event, I thought that the
restaurant
Use synonyms
 has
good
Add an article
a good
show examples
 reputation. it was one of the worst services which I obtained
last
Linking Words
 Sunday
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 because I had never ever
have
Wrong verb form
had
show examples
 many bad
experience
Change to a plural noun
experiences
show examples
 in my entire life.
Firstly
Linking Words
, when
me
Change the pronoun
I
show examples
 and my family entered
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the party hall, all the chairs were kept in
wrong
Change the article
the wrong
show examples
 direction.
Secondly
Linking Words
, I had already mentioned to your staff members that arrange some welcome drinks for guests, but I did not see any of
staff
Correct article usage
the staff
show examples
 members with a glass of drinks.
As a result
Linking Words
, the service of your
restaurant
Use synonyms
 ruined the whole event evening. All the snacks were cold and hard to eat.
Moreover
Linking Words
, I cannot explain
food
Add an article
the food
show examples
,
which
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
served in the main course, it was too oily and had
bad
Add an article
a bad
show examples
 odor. As a mistake by your
restaurant
Use synonyms
 management, I hope you will compensate me for my loss. I look forward to receiving your response. Yours faithfully, Prabhjot Kaur

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coherence and cohesion
Consider improving the overall structure of your letter. Make sure each paragraph clearly focuses on one idea to enhance coherence.
coherence and cohesion
Pay attention to grammar and punctuation, such as correct use of capital letters and avoiding run-on sentences for better clarity.
task achievement
Try to provide more specific examples of how the poor service impacted your evening. This will strengthen your response and make it more compelling.
task achievement
A more formal tone would be suitable in your request for compensation. Using polite and professional language can improve the tone of your letter.
task achievement
You stated your dissatisfaction clearly at the beginning of the letter, which sets the context.
task achievement
You provided specific details about your experience, which helps in understanding the reasons for your dissatisfaction.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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