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Writing Samples
Band 5

The table below shows the employment of students from four countries in the UK after their first courses in 2001. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant. First degree graduates from different UK universities in employment in 2001 Countries Permanent employment Temporary employment Overseas employment Scotland 43.6 % 20.2 % 2.6 % Total employment England 66.4 % 33 % 23 % 2.3 % Wales 58.3 % 30 % 12.4 % 2.9 % Northern Ireland 45.3% 20 % 8.6 % 5 % 33.6 %

The table below shows the employment of students from four countries in the UK after their first courses in 2001. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant. First degree graduates from different UK universities in employment in 2001 Countries Permanent employment Temporary employment Overseas employment Scotland 43.6 % 20.2 % 2.6 % Total employment England 66.4 % 33 % 23 % 2.3 % Wales 58.3 % 30 % 12.4 % 2.9 % Northern Ireland 45.3% 20 % 8.6 % 5 % 33.6 %
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The given table illustrates the
employment
Use synonyms
 status of
first degree
Add a hyphen
first-degree
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graduates
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 from four European nations in 2001. A cursory glance at the graph is enough to make it clear that the maximum Scottish
graduates
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 got
employment
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,
whereas
Linking Words
 the minimum
graduates
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 from Northern Ireland got
jobs
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 in the given year. Out of the total Scottish
graduates
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, 66.4%
got
Verb problem
were
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 employed and out of these 43.6% got permanent
jobs
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, 20.2% got temporary
jobs
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, but only 2.6% were employed in other countries. The degree holders from England showed a similar pattern, with 58.3% landing into some sort of a job. 33% got permanent job, 23% got
adhoc
Correct your spelling
ad-hoc
employment
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 and the remaining 2.9% went for overseas
jobs
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. In total, 45.3%
Welsh
Change preposition
of Welsh
show examples
graduates
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 got hired, of which 30% had
perment
Correct your spelling
permanent
jobs
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, 12.4% had temporary
jobs
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 and only 2.9% had overseas
jobs
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.
Overall
Linking Words
, it is interesting to note that
although
Linking Words
 the recruitment rate of grads from Northern Ireland was the lowest,
yet
Correct word choice
apply
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the highest went for overseas
employment
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 among the given four countries.

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Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Basic structure: Add more body paragraphs.
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Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words employment, graduates, jobs with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "give" was used 3 times.
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