Countries such as China, India, and Japan have unsustainable population growths. In fact, many experts are of the opinion that the population ‘explosion’ which is now a very worrying concern, is the most serious threat to life on this planet. Give some suggestions to address this problem

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In the contemporary era, the

population

Use synonyms

are increase

Change the verb form

increases

show examples

in the number of individuals in some countries.

This

Linking Words

includes women, men,

children

Correct word choice

and children

show examples

in the city.

However

Linking Words

, many experts are

giving

Verb problem

raising

show examples

concerns over the

growths

Fix the agreement mistake

growth

show examples

Use synonyms

population

Correct article usage

the population

show examples

, which is more threat to life on the earth. In

this

Linking Words

essay, I will justify my opinion with some of the reasons. To commence with,

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

family planning programs

implement

Wrong verb form

are implemented

show examples

to educate individuals about contraception and encourage smaller families.

Such

Linking Words

programs can raise awareness about the benefits of having fewer children.

For example

Linking Words

- Gender equality

and

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

empower

Correct subject-verb agreement

empowers

show examples

women by improving career opportunities, which often leads to delayed childbirth and reduced birth rates.

Additionally

Linking Words

, In some

states

Add a comma

states,

show examples

males were given much importance than

other

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

females because of

such

Linking Words

past mentality of

Change the word

their

show examples

ancestors. Moving ahead, To encourage economic development that focuses on sustainable growth and incorporates

population

Use synonyms

control measures, initiatives that

rise

Correct your spelling

raise

show examples

living

standard

Fix the agreement mistake

standards

show examples

often correlate with reduced fertility rates.

For example

Linking Words

- In the countryside, the living standard

are

Change the verb form

show examples

very poor and only two out of four children are studying in schools and by

this

Linking Words

method we can improve their living standard.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, to

strenghthen

Correct your spelling

strengthen

the healthcare systems to ensure the availability and

accessibilty

Correct your spelling

accessibility

of reproductive health services, including contraception. In conclusion, I reiterate, that the family planning programs implement to educate individuals about contraception and encourage smaller families. To encourage economic development that focuses on sustainable growth and incorporates

population

Use synonyms

control measures, initiatives that

rise

Correct your spelling

raise

show examples

living

standard

Fix the agreement mistake

standards

show examples

often correlate with reduced fertility rates which cannot be overlooked either.

nazianoor1314Sun Feb 16 2025

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Grammar

Make sure to use the appropriate verb forms. For example, it should be 'the population is increasing' instead of 'the population are increase.'

Clarity

Clarify your points. Some ideas, while valid, could be expressed more clearly to enhance understanding. Try to develop each point fully before moving to the next one.

Cohesion

Work on the cohesiveness of your sentences and paragraphs. Use linking words consistently to improve the flow of your ideas.

Content

You have introduced some important points regarding population control and economic development.

Context

You've made a good attempt to present your opinion on a pressing global issue.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

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6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
19
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

253 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

unsustainable population growth
population explosion
family planning programs
gender equality
economic development
sustainable growth
fertility rates
technological advancements
infrastructural development
incentivize
tax benefits
subsidies
environmental impacts
social impacts
healthcare systems
reproductive health services
contraception
legislative measures

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Countries such as China, India, and Japan have unsustainable population growths. In fact, many experts are of the opinion that the population ‘explosion’ which is now a very worrying concern, is the most serious threat to life on this planet. Give some suggestions to address this problem

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Many countries spend alot of money to make bicycles easier.Why? Is it the best solution for transport problems?

Disruptive school children have negative influence on others. students who are noisy and disobedient should be grouped together and taught separately. Do you agree or disagree with this view

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development ?

Some people spend most of their lives living close to where they were born. What might be the reasons for this? What are the advantages and disadvantages?”