Employers sometimes ask people applying for jobs for personal information, such as their hobbies and interests, and whether they are married or single. Some people say that this information may be relevant and useful. Others disagree. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

In the

last

Linking Words

decade, many

people

Use synonyms

have debated what to ask when recruiting staff worldwide. Many believe that

employers

Use synonyms

should collect their personal

information

Use synonyms

such

Linking Words

as their leisure activities and marital status as they are important,

however

Linking Words

, others feel that

this

Linking Words

information

Use synonyms

can not be useful. Personally, I believe that personal

information

Use synonyms

plays a crucial role in understanding

person

Correct article usage

a person

show examples

and it should be applicable

for

Change preposition

show examples

the recruitment

process

Use synonyms

, and

this

Linking Words

essay will explore both

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

perspectives. There are several key benefits of knowing other's personal

background

Fix the agreement mistake

backgrounds

show examples

when recruiting. One major fact is that it plays a critical role in when understanding a person. If

employers

Use synonyms

know about their employee's hobbies, interests, and family, they may be able to implement a company

process

Use synonyms

and procedures which support them. Many organisations,

for instance

Linking Words

, tend to have team-building activities so if they can understand workers'

preference

Fix the agreement mistake

preferences

show examples

, they can organise events which satisfy their staff. Another key aspect is to create a safe and enjoyable place to work

employers

Use synonyms

should know about their

Fix the agreement mistake

likes

show examples

and

dislike

Correct subject-verb agreement

dislikes

show examples

. An individual who enjoys travelling, for

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

example, wants to work remotely so that

employers

Use synonyms

could implement

this

Linking Words

before

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

if they know it.

In contrast

Linking Words

, some

people

Use synonyms

argue

this

Linking Words

information

Use synonyms

should not

collect

Wrong verb form

be collected

show examples

as it may cause security

issue

Fix the agreement mistake

issues

show examples

. Because of rising cyber crimes these days, many

people

Use synonyms

might be reluctant to share their personal

information

Use synonyms

. Many employees,

for example

Linking Words

, seem to apply

jobs

Change preposition

for jobs

show examples

, which are not

demanding

Wrong verb form

demand

show examples

this

Linking Words

data.

As a result

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

many companies have removed

this

Linking Words

section in their selection

process

Use synonyms

. In conclusion,

this

Linking Words

essay discussed

the

Remove the article

apply

show examples

both viewpoints

about

Change preposition

show examples

collecting personal

information

Use synonyms

interviewing

Add an article

the interviewing

show examples

process

Use synonyms

. In my opinion, it can be invaluable for not only

for

Change preposition

apply

show examples

firms but

also

Linking Words

people

Use synonyms

who work there.

madu.r1991Thu Jun 19 2025

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task achievement

Add more details to support your ideas. Strengthen your arguments with specific examples or situations.

coherence and cohesion

Use clear linking words to connect your ideas. This will help your essay flow better.

coherence and cohesion

Make sure to proofread your essay for grammar and spelling mistakes. This will help improve clarity.

content

You presented both views clearly.

content

Your conclusion summarizes your opinion well.

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9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
17
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

290 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

job application
personal information
hobbies and interests
marital status
relevant
useful
privacy
assessing candidates
qualifications
experience

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Employers sometimes ask people applying for jobs for personal information, such as their hobbies and interests, and whether they are married or single. Some people say that this information may be relevant and useful. Others disagree. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Today, more and more tourists are visiting places where conditions are difficult, such as the Sahara desert or the Antarctic. What are the benefits and disadvantages four tourists who visit such places?