IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

most high level -position in companies filled by men even through the workforce in many developed countries is more 50% female companies should be required to allocate certain % of these portion to women

Its
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It's
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 argued that firms should be legally required to appoint a certain proportion of females to high-level positions.
This
Linking Words
 essay agrees with that statement , because
women
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 are capable of doing a job to the same level as
men
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 ,and females are performing boys in many university courses.
Women
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 possess the ability to perform at the same professional level as
men
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, as they often hold equivalent qualifications and demonstrate advanced knowledge
as well as
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 diverse professional skills.
While
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 many jobs rely primarily on mental abilities, communication, and decision-making,
women
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 have proven to excel in these areas through their consistent performance and adaptability.
Moreover
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,
because
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apply
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they frequently display strong leadership qualities. As
result
Correct article usage
a result
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 ,they are able to guide teams to
work
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 together more effectively and harmoniously.
For example
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,Recent studies that involved both genders revealed that, when comparing their
overall
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 performance, females often outperformed males in several essential skills
such
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 as communication, organisation, and multitasking.
Women
Use synonyms
 are currently outperforming
men
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 in many fields because they are more focused and consistent.They have proven their ability by achieving high scores in many scientific fields.
Linking Words
Also
Add a comma
Also,
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They
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they
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 show strong responsibility and commitment toward both their personal life and professional duties.
Furthermore
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, they focus on education to achieve a successful career,they continue
develop
Verb problem
to develop
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skill
Fix the agreement mistake
skills
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 to prove that
can
Correct pronoun usage
they can
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work
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 in any field that
men
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 do and
succeeds
Correct subject-verb agreement
succeed
show examples
 in it .
For example
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, a magazine mentioned that the number of
women
Use synonyms
 has increased in many sectors
Linking Words
such
Punctuation problem
, such
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 as law and medicine.
Linking Words
to
Fix capitalization
To
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 conclude,
men
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not should
Correct word order
should not
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 be given the majority of
high level
Use the right word
high-level
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-
Punctuation problem
apply
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jobs in
bussiness
Correct your spelling
business
,
becuse
Correct your spelling
because
women
Use synonyms
 can perform
Rephrase
as well
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as
men
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 ,and do better in
work
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 .
Linking Words
also
Fix capitalization
Also
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demstrate
Correct your spelling
demonstrate
has
Verb problem
apply
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qulificatin
Correct your spelling
qualifications
 at
work
Use synonyms
 .

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task response
Make your view clear in one strong line at the start. Add a short plan in the first part and a brief wrap up at the end.
coherence and cohesion
Link ideas with easy connect words. Use short starts to each paragraph and keep ideas in order: intro, two body parts, and a clear end.
language
Fix grammar and form. Use simple, correct sentences. Watch punctuation and spellings so the text is easy to read.
strength
The writer shows a clear position and tries to argue for quotas.
content
The idea that women can do as well as men is stated.
evidence
Some parts use examples to back points.
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