Many high-level positions in companies are filled by men even though the workforce in many developed countries is more than 50 percent female. Companies should be required to allocate a certain percentage of these positions to women.

Female

Fix the agreement mistake

Females

show examples

must have leading roles/senior jobs in

organizations

Change the spelling

organisations

show examples

. I completely agree.

This

Linking Words

work may help

women

Use synonyms

in the economic field.

For example

Linking Words

They

Fix capitalization

they

show examples

can have higher salaries and improve their levels of income.

Such

Linking Words

type

Correct article usage

a type

show examples

jobs

Fix the agreement mistake

job

show examples

is so important for personal reasons.

For instance

Linking Words

They

Fix capitalization

they

show examples

can have more self-trust as

women

Use synonyms

can

realize

Change the spelling

realise

show examples

their importance in country's development.

Finally

Linking Words

This

Fix capitalization

this

show examples

kind of work is necessary for human factors.That means that

Women

Use synonyms

have the same rights

Change preposition

show examples

men: they are equal.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, many people do not agree with me. They believe that

Punctuation problem

apply

show examples

Fix capitalization

show examples

is refused for healthy causes.

Linking Words

for

Fix capitalization

For

show examples

example,

Women

Use synonyms

in leadership positions might have more stress.

Secondly

Linking Words

Fix capitalization

show examples

is rejected for cultural interests.

For instance

Linking Words

, Men in some countries or cultures do not accept

to be

Wrong verb form

being

show examples

led by

women

Use synonyms

Linking Words

finally

Fix capitalization

Finally

show examples

Fix capitalization

show examples

is unacceptable for some side effects.

This

Linking Words

means that

Punctuation problem

apply

show examples

Women

Use synonyms

in those jobs ignore some home and children's duties.

To conclude

Linking Words

, there are no easy answers to

this

Linking Words

question.

However

Linking Words

, I tend to believe that

this

Linking Words

idea is beneficial if people use it correctly, and it is important to apply it in a balanced and responsible way.

sg.alshamsi800

Nov 18, 2025

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structure

Use clear paragraph with one main idea in each one.

structure

Link ideas with simple words like also, and, but, for example.

content

Add more real examples or facts to back points.

language

Check grammar and word order to avoid long run‑on sentences.

content

Clear stance on the topic.

structure

Some linking words are used well.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
17
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

189 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

gender disparity
glass ceiling
workforce representation
gender diversity
equal opportunity
professional advancement
social equality
gender equality
empowerment
barrier
discrimination
inequality
bias
reinforce
inclusive
combat
strive for
promote
nurture
enhance
progressive
implement
quota system

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Many high-level positions in companies are filled by men even though the workforce in many developed countries is more than 50 percent female. Companies should be required to allocate a certain percentage of these positions to women.

In the future, nobody will buy printed newspaper or books because they will be able to read everything they want online without paying. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Many people in poor countries die from diseases that are curable because they cannot afford the medication required. Do you believe that drug companies should make their products available at reduced prices in these countries?

Some people fail in school, but end up being successful in life. Why do you think that is the case? What is the most important thing to succeed in life?