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Writing Samples
Band 5

In many countries, primary and secondary schools close for two months or more in the summer holidays. What is the value of long school holidays? What are the arguments in favour of shorter school holidays?

In various regions, primary and secondary schools allow
students
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 to take a break of about 2 to 3 months
in
Change preposition
during
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 the
summer
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 holidays.
This
Linking Words
 break offers many benefits to
students
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, but there are
also
Linking Words
 valid reasons to shorten it. On the one hand, a long
summer
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 break can bring many
values
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benefits
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 for
students
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which
Punctuation problem
, which
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 can recharge their
battery
Fix the agreement mistake
batteries
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, enrich their experiences and so on. After numerous exams and pressure in the semesters, they
Linking Words
finally can
Correct word order
can finally
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 relax for a long period of
time
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, which can
relax
Verb problem
help relax
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 their mental health.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, learners can have more
time
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 to travel, explore, participate in
summer
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 camps, or simply spend
time
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 with family and themselves.
For example
Linking Words
, in the
summer
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, my friends are always travelling or joining volunteer work. If holidays were shortened, they could only have minor activities.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, shortening the amount of
time
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 will ensure continuity in learning and stronger education.
Firstly
Linking Words
, if
students
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 rest for too long, they can’t catch up with the rhythm of
new
Correct article usage
the new
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semesters
Fix the agreement mistake
semester
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and
Punctuation problem
, and
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this
Linking Words
 can easily lead to excessive laziness and relaxation.
Secondly
Linking Words
, pupils in their final year of high school need to start the school year earlier to have more
time
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 to review, supplement, and expand their knowledge in preparation for entrance exams to higher grades.
For instance
Linking Words
, collegians in Vietnam face the university entrance exam, which requires high scores and certificates to get into top universities. If holidays were shortened, they could have more
time
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 to prepare and get ready for the new school year. In conclusion, depending on
grade
Correct article usage
the grade
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, the government could divide the holiday period in the most reasonable way.
This
Linking Words
 could help
students
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 who need rest to have enough
time
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 to recover, and give those who need to get back into shape and prepare early more
time
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 to achieve the best results.

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task response
Plan your answer first. Start with a clear view in the first line and then talk about value and limits in full steps.
coherence
Give a clear plan in writing. Say what you will cover and then do it.
content
Add more detail to each idea. Give one extra simple example for each side.
coherence
Use simple link words to join ideas, like 'also', 'but', 'for example', 'however'.
language
Check small grammar and word choice. Some sentences sound a bit awkward.
structure
Two sides are shown and a final idea is given.
coherence
Good use of opposite views with 'on the one hand' and 'on the other hand'.
content
Some real examples are used, such as travel and exams.
Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • long holidays
  • short holidays
  • summer break
  • rest
  • health
  • family time
  • travel
  • reading
  • learning
  • memory
  • gaps
  • exams
  • curriculum
  • planning
  • cost
  • money
  • parent
  • teacher
  • student
  • school
  • summer school
  • enrichment
  • activities
  • schedule
  • fairness
  • access
  • inequality
  • support
  • spare time
  • staggered holidays
  • intersession
  • balance
  • policy
  • example
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