IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

You work for an international company. You have seen an advertisement for a training course which will be useful for your job. Write a letter to your manager. In your letter, - describe the training course you want to do - explain what the company could do to help you - say how the course will be useful for your job Begin your letter as follows: Dear Sir or Madam,

Dear Sir or
madam
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Madam
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, I am
sukhmanpreet kair
Fix capitalization
Sukhmanpreet Kair
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. I am working in your company in
health
Correct article usage
the health
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 department. I am working from India
and
Punctuation problem
, and
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 I saw
post
Correct article usage
a post
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 on our website that our company are providing some CPR and First aid
program
Fix the agreement mistake
programs
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 which will be very beneficial for me in the future. Like, I am planning to do volunteer
in
Check wording
work in
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 some old
ages
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age
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 homes
and
Punctuation problem
, and
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 they want
to
Verb problem
apply
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me
have
Verb problem
to have
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CPR
Correct article usage
a CPR
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 and first aid certificate first
so
Rephrase
apply
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,
I
Correct word choice
so I
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am requesting
to
Change preposition
that
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 you
to
Verb problem
apply
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provide me
Linking Words
further
Change preposition
with further
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 steps
to
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on
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 how to
enroll
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enrol
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 in the program. I really appreciate your time. Your faithful Sukhman

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task response
Be clear on the course name and what it is. Say the exact course you want and who runs it. State how it will help your job.
coherence
Make the letter in clear parts. Put one idea in each paragraph. Use simple linking words (and, also, but). Check small error in form and grammar to keep a calm tone.
tone
The letter is polite and has a respectful closing.
strength
It shows you think how the course can help you at work and in future plans.
strength
You ask for steps to enroll, which is a good practical request.
Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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