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Writing Samples
Band 5

In modern times, young adults are spending less time with their families and more time with their friends. Why has this change occurred? Do you think parents should force their children to spend more time at home?

#times #adults #time #families #friends #change #parents #force #children #home
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Nowadays, adolescents are
inclining
Suggestion
inclined
 to spend the majority of
time
Use synonyms
 with their friends rather than their family members. Not only will
this
Linking Words
essay discuss
Accept comma addition
essay, discuss
 the reasons for
such
Linking Words
 trend to
occur but
Accept comma addition
occur, but
 it will
also
Linking Words
 explain my reasons why I believe parents should forcibly make their children spend more
time
Use synonyms
 at home. The technological era and the fast paced world that people
live
Suggestion
are living
 in these days have made the gap between generations to grow large. To illustrate, youngsters usually opt to live in the virtual world of social media,
such
Linking Words
 as Facebook, and electronic games, in which, they can find peers with mutual interests that they may not find with their family members.
In addition
Linking Words
, most of millennial parents work for extended hours in order to
fulfill
put in effect
fulfil
 the needs of their families;
therefore
Linking Words
, they do not get free
time
Use synonyms
 to integrate themselves in their children’s lives. If the gap between fosters and children is large, the chances of children’s alienation will increase between them. In my perspective, being of a dire impact on all family members, parents ought to oblige the children to devote more
time
Use synonyms
 for family in order to bridge the mentioned gap.
Firstly
Linking Words
, children are more susceptible
for
Suggestion
to
 negative social
media peer
Accept comma addition
media, peer
 pressure if they spend most of their
time
Use synonyms
 on the Internet without proper supervision, which may lead to deviation in their morals, as per several studies by human development specialists. Another impact, many hours staying away from parents can cause bonds between family members to weaken, and
this
Linking Words
 may breed crime among children due to lack of guidance. To conclude, the widespread trend of
children sparing
Accept comma addition
children, sparing
 more
time
Use synonyms
 with friends might be attributable to the distant in interests and lack of
time
Use synonyms
, and I opine that forcing children to spend more
time
Use synonyms
 with their families is of utmost importance.
Submitted by arghavan.kayvani on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • independence
  • establish
  • identity
  • influence
  • social media
  • digital communication
  • commitments
  • pressure
  • academic
  • profession
  • prioritize
  • cultural shifts
  • societal shifts
  • peer relationships
  • emotional support
  • guidance
  • voluntary
  • autonomy
  • balance
  • resilient
  • overbearing
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