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Writing Samples
Band 5

The two line graphs show the number of births and deaths in the United Kingdom. The figures shown are from 10-year intervals starting in 1951 and going into 2051. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The two line graphs show the number of births and deaths in the United Kingdom. The figures shown are from 10-year intervals starting in 1951 and going into 2051. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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The graphs exhibit the birth and death counts in the United
Kingdom
Use synonyms
 between 1951 and 2051. The general trend in terms of
number
Use synonyms
 of births in the United
Kingdom
Use synonyms
 is downwards. There were increases in birth figures in 1961 and 1991, but these were only temporary. By the year 2051, the
number
Use synonyms
 of births is expected to hit around 3,500,000 deliveries. Incidentally, it would be one of the lowest levels recorded in the country.
In contrast
Linking Words
, the
number
Use synonyms
 of deaths in the United
Kingdom
Use synonyms
 has been increasing since 1951.
According to
Linking Words
 the graph, the death count is expected to come close to 4,500,000 by 2051.
This
Linking Words
 count is almost two times higher than the
number
Use synonyms
 of deaths in the country in 1951. By 2051, it is expected that the
number
Use synonyms
 of deaths
would
Wrong verb form
will
show examples
 be significantly higher than the
number
Use synonyms
 of births in the United
Kingdom
Use synonyms
.
This
Linking Words
 is
opposite
Correct article usage
the opposite
show examples
 of the birth and death count status in the country
during
Change preposition
in
show examples
 1951.

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Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Basic structure: Add more body paragraphs.
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Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 75%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words kingdom, number with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "graphs" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 5 times.
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