Women and men are commonly seen as having different strengths and weaknesses. Is it right to exclude males and females from certain jobs because of their gender?

#women #men #strengths #weaknesses #right #males #females #jobs #gender

Recruitment based on the abilities of the employee is an acceptable tool among companies ,

however

, there is a misunderstanding in

this

issue that has assumed the gender type is the valuable factor in dividing certain careers which one is suitable for males or females ,so ,I will discuss

this

viewpoint and give my opinion.

First

of all, it is well known that the great chefs are

men

,but, many nations believe cooking is the responsibility of women ,

this

opinion will remove males from

this

job ,while ,the strengths which are needed for making delicious meals are creativity , high power in a sense of smell and taste ,at a result ,excluding

men

from cooking is not a correct decision.

Second

, some countries have expressed the manager position must be more suitable for

men

than women ,because the policymakers think

men

have more authority and merit for

this

position that

this

view is common among patriarchial societies,while,reportedly some nations have

been

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

conducted a scientific study that female managers have shown more sympathy with their staff and better role model for encouraging their employees,at a result,

this

instituitioninstitutions

Correct your spelling

institution institutions

that have females on the head of

department

Add an article

the department

a department

show examples

have more

successful

Replace the word

success

show examples

than others,

however

,in the past , masculinity is a power to doing many jobs but nowadays the most percentage of jobs are independent to physical strength . To sum up, dividing the population with a wedge of sexuality will remove persons who can play a useful role in their community ,

governments

Correct word choice

and governments

show examples

must enact rules to set equality

Change preposition

show examples

job positions for both genders.

Submitted by homa.ebrahimi987 on Fri Jul 15 2022

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Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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4Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

262 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Women and men are commonly seen as having different strengths and weaknesses. Is it right to exclude males and females from certain jobs because of their gender?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

In many cities there is a lack of space to develop and as a result, in order to modernise, old buildings are demolished and replaced with new buildings. What are the disadvantages of knocking down old buildings? Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

In many large cities, people waste hours of their time every day because of traffic congestion on the road. What are the causes of this, what solution can you suggest

Some people think that the main factors influencing a child’s development these days are things such as television, friends, and music. Others believe that the family still remains more important. Discuss both opinions and give your opinion.

Environmental problems are becoming a global issue and are encounter-challenging the quality of life.