Women and men are commonly seen as having different strengths and weaknesses. Is it right to exclude males and females from certain jobs because of their gender?

Recruitment based on the abilities of the employee is an acceptable tool among companies ,
however
, there is a misunderstanding in
this
issue that has assumed the gender type is the valuable factor in dividing certain careers which one is suitable for males or females ,so ,I will discuss
this
viewpoint and give my opinion.
First
of all, it is well known that the great chefs are
men
,but, many nations believe cooking is the responsibility of women ,
this
opinion will remove males from
this
job ,while ,the strengths which are needed for making delicious meals are creativity , high power in a sense of smell and taste ,at a result ,excluding
men
from cooking is not a correct decision.
Second
, some countries have expressed the manager position must be more suitable for
men
than women ,because the policymakers think
men
have more authority and merit for
this
position that
this
view is common among patriarchial societies,while,reportedly some nations have
been
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
conducted a scientific study that female managers have shown more sympathy with their staff and better role model for encouraging their employees,at a result,
this
instituitioninstitutions
Correct your spelling
institution institutions
that have females on the head of
department
Add an article
the department
a department
show examples
have more
successful
Replace the word
success
show examples
than others,
however
,in the past , masculinity is a power to doing many jobs but nowadays the most percentage of jobs are independent to physical strength . To sum up, dividing the population with a wedge of sexuality will remove persons who can play a useful role in their community ,
governments
Correct word choice
and governments
show examples
must enact rules to set equality
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
job positions for both genders.
Submitted by homa.ebrahimi987 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: