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Band 2

These four pies show the percentage of men and women in different organisations with different working duration in each week in the UK in 2014. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

#four #pies #show #percentage #men #women #organisations #duration #week #uk #summarise #information #features #comparisons
The pie charts compare the proportion of two
gender
Change to a plural noun
genders
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 in
different
Add an article
the different
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workplace
Fix the agreement mistake
workplaces
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with different working
hours
 weekly in the UK in 2014. From the overall perspective, 46 more
hours
 was the highest proportion of working duration in both
Correct your spelling
organizations
organisations
organasitions
Correct your spelling
organisations
 except
the
Change preposition
for the
show examples
figure
 of
female
Fix the agreement mistake
females
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 in private companies. In government, It is clear that 30% of male employees
works
Change the verb form
work
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 for over 46
hours
 a
week
, while the
figure
 of that for female was 36%. The men
Correct pronoun usage
who work
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work
Wrong verb form
working
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 less than 12
hours
 a
week
 made up 46%, while the
figure
 for women was 45. 24% of the men worked between 13 to 45
hours
 a
week
, 6% higher than that of women. In
private
Add an article
a private
show examples
company
Fix the agreement mistake
companies
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, male employees who work over 46
hours
 a
week
 comprised 34% , almost 8 times bigger than the
figure
 for
female
Fix the agreement mistake
females
show examples
. the
figure
 for
Add an article
a male
the male
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male
Fix the agreement mistake
males
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 who worked between 13 and 45
hours
 was 3% bigger than that of
female
Fix the agreement mistake
females
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, whereas the
figure
of
Change preposition
for
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 work between 1 and 12
hours
 for women was 33% bigger than
Correct pronoun usage
that of
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of
Change preposition
for
show examples
male
Fix the agreement mistake
males
show examples
.
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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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