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Band 5.5

The line chart shows trends in terms of employment in the USA in millions and predictions for the future.

The line chart shows trends in terms of employment in the USA in millions and predictions for the future.
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The line graph explains the quantities of
jobs
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 in the United States and millions.
Also
Linking Words
, the graph describes the possible tendencies in
up-coming
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upcoming
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 years.
Overall
Linking Words
, between 1975
an
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and
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 2025 service employment races in the USA
while
Linking Words
, manufacturing
jobs
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 fluctuate in agriculture employment drastically decreases.
Additionally
Linking Words
,
jobs
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 in the service industry begin with only 10
million
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employees
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 in 1975.
Moreover
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, it wasn't until 1979 by the
quantity
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number
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 of
jobs
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 in the sector rose
up
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apply
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to 80
million
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, with a prediction of 90
million
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employees
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 in 2025.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, agriculture
jobs
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 were
mostly
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most
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 popular in 1975 holding 80
million
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employees
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.
Although
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 amount plunged dramatically in 1979 and continue to deteriorate in future years.
Finally
Linking Words
, the number of people who worked in manufacturing began with 10
million
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jobs
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 in 1975 and peaked in the 1980s with a total of 40
million
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employees
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.
To sum up
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, the most dramatic rise in
quantity
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the quantity
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 of
jobs
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 inside the line map
,
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apply
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 is
the
Change preposition
in the
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 service field of work. And in comparison, the manufacturing and agriculture
jobs
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 show a consistent fall in the number of
employees
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through
Change preposition
between
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 the years
of
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apply
show examples
1975 and 2025.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words jobs, million, employees with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "dramatically" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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