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Writing Samples
Band 6

The charts below show the average percentages in typical meals of three type of nutrients, all of which may be unhealthy if eaten too much. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features,and make comparison where relevant.

The charts below show the average percentages in typical meals of three type of nutrients, all of which may be unhealthy if eaten too much. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features,and make comparison where relevant.
#show #percentages #meals #three #type #nutrients #summarise #information #features #comparison
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Overall
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, the pie chart illustrates figures behind preferences to choose a cycle over a vehicle for travelling to work with additional benefits between these two options.
Firstly
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, 30% of
people
Use synonyms
 are travelling by cycle, think that it would help our fitness and improve health
along with
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 their bill, less population and compare to other modes of transport as well. Where is 50% of
people
Use synonyms
 have used it to determine parking problems
.
Change the punctuation
?
show examples
 They must have faced followed by 30% of things. It’s cost-free and 12% have a belief of. It will be faster than cars in traffic which is pretty reasonable.
On the other hand
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, the majority of
people
Use synonyms
 (40%) have used cars for comfort Ness
while
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 travelling all the 21% of the reason to drive because their workplace is far away, surprisingly 14% of
people
Use synonyms
 have driven for something with their work and other things that it's a faster option than a bicycle and 11% have a similar belief of its
also
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 safer to travel by cars respectively.
Submitted by user349953 on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Contractions: Don't use contractions.
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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words people with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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