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Writing Samples
Band 7

The line graphs show the production and demand for steel in million tonnes and the number of workers employed in the steel industry in the UK in 2010.

The line graphs show the production and demand for steel in million tonnes and the number of workers employed in the steel industry in the UK in 2010.
#line #graphs #show #production #demand #steel #million #tonnes #workers #industry #uk
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The given line graph illustrates how much
steel
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 is produced and demanded in
million
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tonnes
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 and the number of people working in the
steel
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 sector in the United Kingdom in the
year
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 2010. Over the
year
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, we can identify that the production of
steel
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 exceeds the actual demand at the beginning of the
year
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, in which over time, the demand for
steel
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 exceeds greater than the production by the end of the
year
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. The amount of
steel
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 produced in January was 4000
Million
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tonnes
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, which reached a peak with an additional thousand
million
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tonnes
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, followed by a decrease before the month of April, where
is
Correct your spelling
it
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 witnessed unaltered changes. Before entering August, it had witnessed a trough of 3000
Million
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tonnes
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 before accelerating back up to its prime figures around September before heading for a steep decline till the end of the period. The demand for
steel
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 began at 2000
Million
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tonnes
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, where the figures climbed to an additional thousand before declining less than their original figures around April. The decline transformed
to
Change preposition
into
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 a rise back to near its peak figure (3000
Million
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tonnes
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), where it experienced similar fluctuation throughout the second quarter
in addition
Linking Words
 to a decline before witnessing steady growth in December, overtaking the production of
steel
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.
Submitted by vanshbisht11 on

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Linking words: Add more linking words.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words steel, million, tonnes, year with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "number of" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "decline" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
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