IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 2

You should spend about 20 minutes on this task. The data below shows the percentage of university students who were in part-time employment at five British universities between 1998 and 2008. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.

#minutes #data #percentage #university #students #employment #five #british #universities #summarise #information #features #comparisons
The line graph illustrates the proportions of part-time employed
university
 students categorised into five distinct British academic institutions from 1998 to 2008.
Overall
,
while
 the percentage of
this
 type of student climbed in terms of three from five universities,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Langsdale
University
experiences
Wrong verb form
experienced
show examples
 a downward trend. Without a doubt, working part-time during the studies became more popular during the analyzed time period. Three out of five universities, to illustrate the point, could increase the share of
this
 category.
Whereas
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Middleridge
University
 and
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Highcastle
University
 increased their percentage steadily to 75% and 65 %, respectively,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Finckleborough
University
 interestingly experienced a steep growth from 18 % in 2005 to over 65 % in 2008.
However
,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Langsdale
University
 could not follow the upward trend and ,
therefore
, decreased its proportion of part-time working students.
While
 ,in 1998, the percentage was outstandingly high
with
Change preposition
at
show examples
 60 % compared to the other universities, despite some fluctuation from 1998 to 2002, a steady fall started in 2002 at 50 % and reached 30 % in 2008.
Submitted by nina-zimmer on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: