IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

the pie charts below shop the online shopping sales for retail sectors in New Zealand in 2003 and 2013 summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant

the pie charts below shop the online shopping sales for retail sectors in New Zealand in 2003 and 2013 summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant
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The pie graph gives
precentages
Correct your spelling
percentages
percentage
 of
online
Add an article
an online
show examples
Fix the agreement mistake
orders
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order
Fix the agreement mistake
orders
show examples
 from four retail
Fix the agreement mistake
sections
show examples
section
Fix the agreement mistake
sections
show examples
 in New Zealand from 2003 to 2013.
Overall
Linking Words
, the
higher
Correct word choice
highest
show examples
features
Fix the agreement mistake
feature
show examples
 in 2003 was the travel materials
also
Linking Words
 the lower attraction
people
Use synonyms
 in New Zealand was the read.But, in 2013
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
people
Use synonyms
sending
Verb problem
spent
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 most of
them
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
 money on movies and songs and not
caring
Wrong verb form
care
show examples
 that much about clothes. In 2003
people
Use synonyms
was spends
Change the verb form
spent
show examples
 36%
for
Change preposition
on
show examples
 travel the
number
Use synonyms
 dropped to 29% in 2013 , moving to dressers the
number
Use synonyms
 hover
change
Replace the word
changed
show examples
 from 24% in 2003 to 16
precentags
Correct your spelling
percentage
percentages
 in 2013,
read
Replace the word
reading
show examples
 books was the lowest
number
Use synonyms
 in 2003 by 19%
while
Linking Words
, in 2013
people
Use synonyms
 became more reader grow the
number
Use synonyms
 by 3%.
Travel
Correct article usage
The travel
show examples
 sector was in 2003 21%
increaced
Correct your spelling
increased
increase
 to 33% in 2013.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Replace the words people, number with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 4 basic words for charts were used.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • retail sectors
  • online shopping sales
  • percentage increase/decrease
  • significant growth/decline
  • electronic goods
  • clothing and footwear
  • food and beverages
  • household goods
  • recreational goods
  • stable sales
  • emerging sectors
  • overall growth
  • decade comparison
  • shift in consumer behavior
  • e-commerce
  • trend analysis
  • market dynamics
  • purchasing habits
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