IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

The chart below shows the proportions of graduates from Brighton University in 2019 entering different employment sectors. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The chart below shows the proportions of graduates from Brighton University in 2019 entering different employment sectors. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#proportions #graduates #brighton #university #employment #sectors #summarise #information #features #comparisons
The pie chart above displays the number of graduates from a university in the UK going into different employment sectors in 2019.
Overall
, the vast majority of students had chosen to work in the service industry.
On the other hand
, the sports sector was the least chosen domain for work by the graduates. The service industries were the career of choice for more than a quarter of the student body, the figure being 33%.
After
this
, Manufacturing, Politics and Education were the fields in which most people were interested in working
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
. The figures for these three services
being
Wrong verb form
are
show examples
 16.3, 14.7 and 12.1 respectively. Transportation (7.8%) and Science (7.3%) both generated similar levels of workers. The lowest levels of employment
via
Change preposition
among
show examples
 the students of Brighton University were documented in the Sports and Charity branches, where only 0.1% and 0.3% of the
student
Fix the agreement mistake
students
show examples
 year worked. The Civil Service realm saw 5.6%,
whereas
 the Other section had a statistic of 2.8%.
Submitted by abeera2012 on

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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Only 4 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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