Nowadays, some employers think that formal academic qualifications are more important than life experience or personal qualities when they look for new employees. Why is it the case? Is it a positive or negative development?

It is quite common these days that, some employers believe that
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
the educational and academic qualifications are more significant than the personal experience in the job vacancies.
This
essay will expatiate the reasons
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
this
phenomenon and how
this
statement influences
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
our society and a logical conclusion will be drawn. There are several causes, why the human resource departments in some companies prefer more educational certificates and
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
achievements.
First,
these types of qualifications often illustrate
formal
Add an article
a formal
the formal
show examples
and serious form of the candidates. In order, to find
best
Change the article
the best
show examples
option, the companies choose
most
Correct article usage
the most
show examples
comprehensive workers.
The employees
Correct article usage
Employees
show examples
with high educational qualifications are
also
associated with
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
personal abilities,
such
as
hardworking
Correct word choice
hard work
show examples
, communication
skill
Fix the agreement mistake
skills
show examples
and problem-solving. As an example, the workers with better curriculum vitae have more chances than others.
Although
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
it is a logical evaluating method,
this
is perhaps not the most reasonable one in terms of selecting the most skilfulness candidate. Nowadays, it is more considerable to have better soft skills
such
as
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
teamwork,
capacity
Correct article usage
the capacity
show examples
to adapt to changes, reliability or
ability
Correct article usage
the ability
show examples
to multitask, than a good university or better grades.
The employees
Correct article usage
Employees
show examples
, who have personal life experience and work in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
many places ,
such
as volunteer activities,
part-time
Correct word choice
and part-time
show examples
working
Replace the word
work
show examples
may better adapt to
workplace
Add an article
the workplace
a workplace
show examples
environment.
Consequently
, achieve more results for a company.
Therefore
,
ignore
Wrong verb form
ignoring
show examples
these factors and
focus
Wrong verb form
focusing
show examples
only
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
educational achievements can negatively affect
company’s
Correct article usage
a company’s
show examples
future.
For instance
, statistics show workers with better personal experience, gain better achievements. In conclusion, It is understandable that
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
employers can rely on
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
educational accomplishments as the main criteria in
selection
Add an article
the selection
show examples
process. Despite
this
, can not be considered
as
Change preposition
apply
show examples
a positive trend as soft skills that are documented through
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
personal experiences should
also
be taken into consideration in
this
process.
Submitted by hebibli.eli on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
While your essay includes an introduction and a conclusion, both could be strengthened by being more explicit in the presentation of the main argument and summarizing key points more clearly.
coherence cohesion
The main points in your essay are somewhat supported, but could benefit from more specific examples and a clearer connection to the thesis throughout the essay.
task achievement
Your response is relevant and addresses the prompt, but could be developed further to demonstrate a fully comprehensive understanding of the topic.
task achievement
The ideas presented are clear, but consider enhancing them to show a deeper level of thought and a broader scope of understanding.
task achievement
Use more relevant specific examples to reinforce your arguments. This could include citing particular studies, providing hypothetical scenarios, or referencing known industry trends to support your points.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Ultimate Speaking practice for IELTS

Practice speaking step by step, answer real-life questions, and build your confidence. Start your free trial and improve your speaking skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • standardized measure
  • specialized expertise
  • dedication
  • long-term goal
  • higher education
  • practical skills
  • adaptability
  • problem-solving abilities
  • communication skills
  • teamwork
  • leadership
  • homogeneous
  • diverse perspectives
  • negative development
  • inequality
  • valuable skills
  • insights
  • balanced approach
  • proficiency
  • safety standards
  • candidate's profile
What to do next:
Look at other essays:

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!