The chart below shows the proportions of british students at one university in england who were able to speak other languages in addition to english,in 2000 and 2010.

The chart below shows the proportions of british students at one university in england who were able to speak other languages in addition to english,in 2000 and 2010.
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The charts demonstrate the proportion of British
students
Use synonyms
at one university in England who were able to
speal
Correct your spelling
speak
other
languages
Use synonyms
in addition
Linking Words
to English, in 2000 and 2010.
According to
Linking Words
the charts, the percentage of
students
Use synonyms
speaking German and two other
languages
Use synonyms
remained the same
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
in 2000 and 2010,
whereas
Linking Words
, figures
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
other
languages
Use synonyms
changed in 2010. The pie charts provide strong information, that Spanish
represents
Wrong verb form
represented
show examples
the largest portion of the chart in 2000 (30%), meanwhile, German and two other
languages
Use synonyms
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
undoubtedly the smallest (10%). 20% of the
students
Use synonyms
could speak in no other
language
Use synonyms
except for English. In comparison, 15% spoke French and another 15% spoke another
language
Use synonyms
too. In 2010 Spanish was 35% of all
students
Use synonyms
, which means its percentage had increased. Another
language
Use synonyms
's figure increased too and made up 20%.
Whereas
Linking Words
, no other
language
Use synonyms
had decreased and
comprisen
Correct your spelling
comprises
comprised
comprise
10%.
Same
Correct article usage
The same
show examples
persentage
Correct your spelling
percentage
German
Change preposition
of German
show examples
, French and two other
languages
Use synonyms
have.
Submitted by satkalialbina07 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "whereas".
Introduction: The introduction is missing.
Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
Vocabulary: Replace the words students, languages, language with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "charts" was used 4 times.
Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • bilingual
  • multilingual
  • proficiency
  • linguistic diversity
  • polyglot
  • language acquisition
  • second language (L2)
  • foreign language
  • fluency
  • working knowledge
  • mother tongue
  • language competence
  • language decline
  • cultural exchange
  • global language
What to do next:
Look at other essays: