IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

You live in a small university town. Last week, you drove to a big city about two hours away to buy a new laptop at a good price. You worked on the laptop all week and finished writing a long assignment that is due shortly. However, this week, the laptop doesn’t even switch on. Write to the store. In your letter: Tell the store where you live & what happened Explain the problem with the laptop State what action you would like the store to take

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Dear Sir I live in a small university town. I am writing in order to complain about a new
laptop
Use synonyms
.
Last
Linking Words
 Monday
when I visited your store
Add the comma(s)
, when I visited your store,
show examples
 buy a new
laptop
Use synonyms
 for my work at
high
Add an article
a high
show examples
 price,
Then
Linking Words
 I used
this
Linking Words
laptop
Use synonyms
 all week and writing a long task. The first thing I would like to draw your attention to is
Use synonyms
laptop's
Correct article usage
the laptop's
show examples
 problem. It was not working
at
Change preposition
apply
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this
Linking Words
 week. To make matters worse, the
laptop
Use synonyms
 does not even switch on. I am afraid that, I visited your shop and bought
Use synonyms
laptop
Add an article
a laptop
the laptop
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. I am disappointed because
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 I spent all my extra time
for
Change preposition
on
show examples
break
Correct article usage
a break
show examples
laptop
Use synonyms
. I would be
greatful
Correct your spelling
grateful
 if you could give me a full refund. Because I will make a plan go to the good
qualifacation
Correct your spelling
qualification
qualifications
 store and buy another a new
laptop
Use synonyms
 at a good price. I look forward to your reply and a resolution to my problem. Yours sincerely.

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logical structure
Your letter needs a clearer structure with distinct introduction, body, and conclusion paragraphs. Begin with a proper salutation (e.g., 'Dear Manager,'), introduce your situation, follow with a paragraph detailing the problem, and another expressing the resolution you expect.
greeting and closing
Work on your greetings and closings. Make sure to start with 'Dear [Title] [Surname],' if known, or 'Dear Sir/Madam,' and close with 'Yours faithfully' if the name is unknown, or 'Yours sincerely' if the name is known, followed by your full name.
single idea per paragraph
Organize your content so that each paragraph contains a single idea or point. This will make your letter easier to follow and more coherent.
complete response
Ensure your letter is fully addressing the tasks required. Mention where you live, describe the problem in more detail, and state clearly the action you expect from the store.
suitable writing tone
Maintain a polite and formal tone throughout the letter. Avoid overly casual language and ensure the language is respectful and appropriate for communication with a business.
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