Write about the following topic: Women and men are commonly seen as having different strengths and weaknesses. Is it right to exclude males or females from certain professions because of their gender? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. • Write at least 250 words.

Lots of
people
believe that both genders have advantages and drawbacks, when it comes to
careers
, some professions should be only suitable for men or
women
.
This
solid thinking is considered a traditional value which develops many repercussions whilst some
people
continue to trust
this
belief that they think to be right.
However
, in our society now, some
people
believe that occupations should not
base
Wrong verb form
be based
show examples
on their
gender
and that
people
have the right to achieve their dream professions. In
this
essay, the idea of whether
careers
should be limited by
gender
will be discussed and provide a personal view on
this
point of view. The vast majority of
women
accept a better education and they have larger aspects of knowledge and develop their own ideas.
Therefore
, they might challenge traditional ideas
such
as employment based on
gender
.
In
addition
Add a comma
addition,
show examples
they have started to do some jobs that most
people
strongly believe that these professions used to be proper for men to do.
For example
, becoming a box is widely believed a job
that is
only suitable for a man.
However
, there are many female boxers who have won honours by themselves.
Moreover
, some
women
have set up companies and
this
behaviour is believed that males are the
person
Fix the agreement mistake
people
show examples
who should own businesses. In my opinion,
careers
should not be limited by
gender
because everyone has their own dreams.
In addition
,
people
have the
rights
Fix the agreement mistake
right
show examples
to follow their dreams and to choose the job they are passionate about
instead
of choosing
careers
because of their
gender
.
Secondly
, traditional thinking believes that females always enjoy a stable and comfortable life.
Fermales
Correct your spelling
Females
should study an easy major because they just need a degree,
then
, they should get married and
pust
Correct your spelling
put
most of their energy into
ther
Correct your spelling
their
families.
On the contrary
, some
women
would like to be considered brave riskers when studying geology and working in extreme and dangerous
environment
Fix the agreement mistake
environments
show examples
. Through the content, it's clear that
people
will lose opportunities if they have traditional thinking when having
this
traditional thinking
then
they choose jobs. In conclusion, there is no doubt that some jobs might be suitable for one
gender
because males and females have different strengths and weaknesses.
However
, a better way is not limited to
people
's choices because of traditional values. I would say that no matter
males
Correct word choice
whether males
show examples
or females, they could do everything that they like.
Submitted by viktoria.popova92 on

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Coherence and Cohesion
Focus on developing a clear logical structure for your essay. This means having a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Each body paragraph should have a main idea supported by examples or explanations.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ensure your introduction and conclusion are clearly defined. The introduction should outline your argument or stance on the topic, and the conclusion should summarize your main points and restate your position in a conclusive manner.
Coherence and Cohesion
Support your main points with specific examples or detailed explanations. This helps to strengthen your argument and make your essay more persuasive.
Task Achievement
Ensure you fully respond to all parts of the task. Clearly address whether you believe it is right or not to exclude individuals from certain professions based on their gender. Provide a balanced discussion if possible.
Task Achievement
Strive for clear and comprehensive development of your ideas. Make sure each paragraph contributes to your overall argument or discussion, and avoid veering off-topic.
Task Achievement
Incorporate relevant, specific examples to support your arguments. These can be from your own knowledge or experience, as requested by the task. This enriches your essay and makes your points more convincing.

Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

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