IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

WRITING TASK 1 You should spend about 20 minutes on this task. The chart above shows the number of men and women in further education in Britain in three periods and whether they were studying full-time or part-time. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make Write at least 150 words.

WRITING TASK 1 You should spend about 20 minutes on this task. The chart above shows the number of men and women in further education in Britain in three periods and whether they were studying full-time or part-time. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make Write at least 150 words.
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The bar chart provides key information about the number of males and females in
further
Linking Words
 education in England in three different periods and the nature of their studying whether it is part-time or full-time. The units are measured in thousands.
Overall
Linking Words
, it is clear from the graph that the amount of women students was the largest in the 1990s.
In addition
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, the number of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
men
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
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fluctuated over the years,
whereas
Linking Words
 the figures
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
 female students grew gradually over the
periods
Fix the agreement mistake
period
show examples
.
According to
Linking Words
 what is shown, the male pupils who were studying
in
Change preposition
apply
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part-time were one thousand in
1970s
Change the article
the 1970s
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.
Subsequently
Linking Words
, it dropped to 850
student
Change to a plural noun
students
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 in
1980s
Correct article usage
the 1980s
show examples
.
Then
Linking Words
, it rose a little reaching 900. In terms of
full time
Add a hyphen
full-time
show examples
, both male and female Pupils had the lowest amount of enrolled students.
Submitted by tuma729 on

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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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