IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Last week you were on a flight to London. Unfortunately, when you got off the plane, you left a bag there. You did not remember about the bag until you got to your hotel. Write a letter to the airline. In your letter •explain what has happened •describe the bag and its contents •say what you would like them to do about this problem You should write at least 150 words. You do NOT need to write any addresses. Begin your letter as follows: Dear Sir or Madam,

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Dear Sir or Madam,
This
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 is to inform you that I was travelling
previous
Correct article usage
the previous

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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 week on flight Airbus - 250 from Paris to London,
where
Correct word choice
and

It seems that conjunction use may be incorrect here.

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 I
forgot
Verb problem
left

There may be a verb use issue here.

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 my
bag
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.
in
Change preposition
on

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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 the plane.
While
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 commuting, I placed my
bag
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 beneath my seat as there was minimal space
in
Change preposition
on

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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 the
airplane
Change the spelling
aeroplane

The spelling of airplane is a non-British variant. For consistency, consider replacing it with the British English spelling.

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 deck. When I reached my hotel, I was shocked to realize that I misplaced it
in
Change preposition
on

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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 the plane. I was carrying a black leather
bag
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 with silver strips on it. The size of the
bag
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 is small
which
Correct pronoun usage
it

It seems that there is a pronoun problem here.

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 contains my
personnel
Replace the word
personal

The word personnel doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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 belongings like
driving
Correct pronoun usage
my driving

It seems that there is a pronoun problem here.

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 license, phone charger and some cosmetics products. I would like you to help me return it at the earliest as I am dependent on
few
Correct article usage
a few

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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 items present in it. If you need any other information regarding my
bag
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.
then
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 I can provide you
the
Add the preposition
with the

It appears that you are missing a preposition with the verb provide. Consider adding the preposition.

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 details. I would like you to coordinate with the lost and found department to identify my
bag
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

. With the description provided above, if you find my
bag
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

,
then
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 I would request you to reach me on my cell - +12423534443. I hope you will promptly take
required
Correct article usage
the required

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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 actions. I look forward to hearing from you soon. Yours sincerely, Justina Marcella

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task achievement
Make sure to specify the flight number accurately, as 'Airbus - 250' does not seem like a typical flight number. It could be confused with the aircraft type.
coherence cohesion
Consider restructuring the second paragraph for better clarity. For example, 'The bag I left behind is a small black leather bag with silver strips. It contains my personal belongings such as my driving license, phone charger, and some cosmetic products.'
suitable writing tone
The tone of the letter is courteous and respectful, which is appropriate for a formal letter to an airline.
greeting and closing
The closing of the letter is polite and reiterates the urgency of the matter effectively.
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