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Band 3.5

the chart below shows the value of one country's export in various categories during 2015 and 2016. the table shows the percentage change in each category of exports in 2016 compared with 2015. Summrarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

the chart below shows the value of one country's export in various categories during 2015 and 2016. the table shows the percentage change in each category of exports in 2016 compared with 2015. Summrarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#value #country #export #categories #percentage #change #category #exports #summrarise #information #features #comparisons
The given bar graph
illusterates
Correct your spelling
illustrates
 a
county's
Correct your spelling
country's
show examples
 amount of money earned from exporting 5 various
items
 in 2015 and 2016, and the table
demonstartes
Correct your spelling
demonstrates
 the shifts in
values
 of each exported item in
two
Correct determiner usage
a
show examples
 years period. As
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
can be seen in the graph, the export earnings during a year for each item
does
Correct subject-verb agreement
do
show examples
 not vary significantly,
however
Add a comma
however,
show examples
 there is a difference in the percentage of changes in the
values
 of each product from 2015 to 2016.
First,
the bar indicates that the general revenue of the exported
products
were
Change the verb form
was
show examples
 quite similar in both years.
However
, petroleum
products
 and engineered goods
satnd
Correct your spelling
stand
 at the top of the earnings of
exporeted
Correct your spelling
exported
items
 list compared to other country's
product
Fix the agreement mistake
products
show examples
 in both years.
Furthermore
 Textiles with
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
earnings of approximately 30
billions
Change to singular
billion
show examples
 in 2015 and 2016
state
Correct your spelling
are
show examples
 lower than other
items
 in the graph.
Secondly
, The table shows the changing pattern in the
values
 of the
products
. In fact, Textiles with
15.24
Correct article usage
a 15.24
show examples
percentage
Replace the word
per cent
show examples
 rise had the highest
value
 shift,
while
 agricultural
products
 had almost 0.1 growth in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
price. Furthur petroleum
products
 and engineered goods as the most exported
items
 had
an
Change the article
a
show examples
 slight increase in the
value
.
Finally
,
gems
Correct article usage
the gems
show examples
 and
jewelleries
Change the wording
jewellery
pieces of jewellery
show examples
value
 percentage shows a 5.18
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 fall. In conclusion,
it is clear that
 the
earnigs
Correct your spelling
earnings
 of the all
products
 seemed to stay steady from 2015 until 2016,
whereas
, the export income
paterns
Correct your spelling
patterns
 of each item
diffrs
Correct your spelling
differ
 from others.
Additionally
, the table provides
inforamtion
Correct your spelling
information
 on the
value
 drop of the gems and
jewelleries
Change the wording
jewellery
pieces of jewellery
show examples
,
while
 there is a
distinct
Change the adjective
distinctly
show examples
 rising trend in
values
Correct article usage
the values
show examples
 of other
products
.
Submitted by TUTOO on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "however, while".
▼
Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words items, values, products, value with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "table" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "shows" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 3 times.
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