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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The charts below show the proportions of British students at one university in England who were able to speak pther languages in addition to English, in 2000 and 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The charts below show the proportions of British students at one university in England who were able to speak pther languages in addition to English, in 2000 and 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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The given charts illustrate the
comparation
Correct your spelling
comparison
 of British
students
Use synonyms
 at one university in England who were able to speak
languages
Use synonyms
 other than primary English in 2000 and 2010.
Overall
Linking Words
, it can clearly be seen that both years have
Spanish only
Add a hyphen
Spanish-only
show examples
 speakers to the same highest proportions,
while
Linking Words
students
Use synonyms
 who have
ability
Add an article
the ability
show examples
 in German only and two other
languages
Use synonyms
were
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
remainly
Correct your spelling
remained
 stable. In terms of Europe
countries
Change noun form
country's
countries'
show examples
languages
Use synonyms
,
Spanish only
Add a hyphen
Spanish-only
show examples
 speakers
lead
Wrong verb form
led
show examples
 the percentages in both 2000 and 2010,
accounted
Wrong verb form
accounting
show examples
 for 30% and 35%, respectively.
Furthermore
Linking Words
,
French only
Add a hyphen
French-only
show examples
 speakers, which
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
actually
have
Wrong verb form
had
show examples
 a great prospect in 2000 gathered 15% of the percentages, it
then
Linking Words
 experienced a slight decline to 10% in 2010.
Lastly
Linking Words
,
German only speaking
Correct your spelling
German-speaking
show examples
students
Use synonyms
relatively
Add a missing verb
were relatively
show examples
 steady and there was no increase throughout the
periode
Correct your spelling
period
 by collected 10%. Regarding
others option
Fix the agreement mistake
other options
show examples
,
students
Use synonyms
 who had the ability to speak in another language saw a moderate rise, since in 2000 it accounted for 10%
then
Linking Words
rosen
Correct your spelling
rose
risen
 up to 20% in 2010.
In contrast
Linking Words
,
students
Use synonyms
 who only speak English significantly decreased,
which
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
initially
Linking Words
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
recorded at exactly 20%
then
Linking Words
 it declined successfully to 10%. Unfortunately, there was no rising accumulation towards two other
languages
Use synonyms
 speaking
students
Use synonyms
 which remained at 10%.

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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 67%.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words students, languages with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentages" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "decline" was used 2 times.
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